WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG
WITH YOU???
The Ugly Website with the Ugly truth
Some ranting from the Animeraider, updated Tuesdays thru Fridays in the evening Pacific Standard Time (mostly)
If you want an explanation, click on The First Post «
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The most recent post The First Post
The infamous "Republicans are Pedophiles" post
Why do I post after 6pm PST? Because people donft stop saying stupid things after the evening news on the East Coast.
Topics
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7/2/09 - Calling Bruce Campbell
7/1/09 - 120 seconds of terror...
6/30/09 - In space, no one can hear your head explode messily
6/24/09 - The Girl from Ipanema
6/23/09 - Where's Waldo? South Carolina Edition
6/12/09 - a question for the NRA
6/9/09 - Arrest those terrorists!
6/1/09 - The Devil made me do it
5/29/09 - Torturous possibilities
4/28/09 - Boy, take one little vacation...
3/31/09 - Willie and the Poorboys
3/20/09 - Special Olympics Cheap Shots
3/19/09 - Green Government (shhh!)
3/13/09 - So Loud you aren't thinking
3/11/09 - Yes, I do find it funny
2/20/09 - Grover Norquist needs to have his mouth taped shut
2/18/09 - Liars and fucking liars
2/12/09 - I was ambushed by Bill ORLY
1/28/09 - Carter goes to China
1/27/09 - Getting back into the swing of things...
1/22/09 - 48 hours to erase 8 years...
1/15/09 - I'll be back soon...
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My wife, me and my kids went out for lunch and came back to seeing breaking news interrupt the Michael Jackson newsfeed. But I have to admit this one is a whopper. So, let me see if I've got this right. The Governor of South Carolina has an affair, leaves the state and fools around on while on the clock, leaves the state in the lurch, and the governor of Alaska resigns?
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She's going to run for President. She's going to come in 4th in a field of 3. That's my bet. Although the wisdom out there is that she's leaving politics for good. I don't buy that. I mean, what's she leaving it for? It's either this or there's something in her closet that is so amazingly awful that it would knock Governor Sanford out of the news cycle - again.
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Is there anyone out there on the Republican side who isn't bat-shit crazy? Even McCain, as much as I despised his methods and ideas, wasn't a lunatic.
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For making me work when I was going to take the day off, and because I love you, Ozzy Osbourne.
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7/2/09 – Calling Bruce Campbell!
All cheap shots today in celebration of the long weekend, so getcher Gin and Tonics ready:
Please tell me Bruce Campbell will star in this. Please!
Dude, health care is already rationed. The money shot from the article I just linked: gfor less than the cost of that futile, 90-minute effort in the ER, the woman could have had all the blood pressure medication she needed for the rest of her life.h
And now itfs Obamafs war.
Stephanopoublogging on the road with the VP.
Try 16.5%, not just under 10.
Love according to the pleasure nazis?
And why do so many of these gChristiansh talk about going to war for their values instead of instilling peace for them?
You know what gets me even more than the idea that lobbyists were going to be allowed to pay to have access to reporters, but that it was only cancelled because they got caught. I mean, how bad do you have to be to be reported for a potential ethics violation by a health care lobbyist? And then there is the fact that they donft think that the input of the public means anything.
If I lived in Vermont Ifd vote for this man.
On the flip side, if I lived in Nevada Ifd run against this man.
I know itfs satire, but this is just what Minnesota needs, EVEN MORE CRAZY!!!!
Ifve been watching a lot of season 1 of SNL, and I have to say, Franken was brilliant.
Bolton, did you lose brain cells in the making of that marvelous mustache?
Ya know, instead of worrying is Obama is a sekrit Muslim, perhaps we should be worried about this group.
Wasnft there a Peaches & Herb song about this?
There is a reason that the term is gUgly Americanh.
And because I love you and to celebrate the countryfs birthday, Chicago.
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7/1/09 – 120 seconds of terrorc
Therefs a famous piece of music – youfve all heard it and yet I would bet that most of you donft know what itfs called or who wrote it. Well, Ifm going to put that to rest now. The music was written by film composer James Horner, and he wrote it for the first Alien movie. It doesnft show up in the movie at all, because director Ridley Scott didnft want music in those tense moments where Sigourney Weaverfs Ripley is preparing to blow up the ship, so it got used in the movie trailer instead.
And itfs shown up in just about every single action movie trailer since. When trailers are made for movies more often than not the final edit isnft done, so they know they will need about 60 to 120 seconds of music and Horner recorded versions for every movie trailer length. Music is often one of the last things done on a film, but the movie studios want the trailers out there to generate interest, so they fall back on James Hornerfs brilliant 2 minutes of pulse-pounding action music. If youfve ever wondered why the music in some movie trailers sounds familiar, this is why – itfs that one piece of music that didnft get used in Alien.
Lots of people have soundtracks running through their heads as they go about their days. Itfs not so strange, just look at the number of people with iPods on their heads. For me today I have some Van Morrison running, and I expect that to later involve into the stellar work of Maaya Sakamoto. But I wonder now if the music in the head of Glenn Beck is that famous piece of music by James Horner.
Ifm sure youfve seen by now the news that a guest on his show openly called for Osama bin Laden to commit an act of terrorism on this nation so that the people would demand that the government gprotect them effectively, consistently, and with as much violence as necessary," to which Beck solemnly nodded his head in agreement (as if he could do it any other way). While most of the outrage has focused on the idea that there are people of supposed intelligence wishing for a terrorist attack I would like to focus on the last part of that sentence.
Protect ourselves with as much violence as necessary? Um, what? Boy have the positions of the right evolved as wefve moved out of the cold war and into terror watch. It used to be that we wanted as much weaponry as humanly possible to deter the outbreak of violence. It sort of worked too, although the reality is much more complicated than that. But now the thinking is to use that weaponry. Where did that bloodlust come from?
Yeah, we got the crap kicked out of us in early fall 2001. It hurt unbelievably, and the reaction to lash out is a natural one. But things have settled somewhat, and wefve exacted a misguided form of revenge for it (therefs nothing about justice in the invasion of Iraq). But apparently some want that hurt feeling to return, so that we can lash out again and get our worthy proportion of blood, because it isnft going to happen without it. And thatfs the key point for me.
These people want their action flick. They want to lash out – cause pain, suffering, and commit acts of violence against these people they do not trust. The bloodlust is already there. But we canft justify it if wefre on the road to peace. Obama isnft going to attack anyone new, so we must be attacked ourselves so that we can commit the acts of violence that we want. Itfs not about fighting terrorism or any form of justice but instead about the desire to kick some ass and kill some people. To cause pain.
So Ifm back to my original observation – that I think that the soundtrack in the heads of Glenn Beck and others is James Hornerfs 2-minute trailer. Can someone please turn the man onto a decent chick-flick? The man has already shown us he can cry. Maybe have John Cusak (okay, maybe a stand-in) hold that boom-box and play some Peter Gabriel? Wefve got to do something before the man actually hurts someone.
Cheap Shots:
Too young to die, even at 97. RIP, Karl Malden. The Streets of San Francisco just got a bit less sane.
Sometimes you wish God would say to these people who talk to him, gShut up!h Well, finally, it happened.
Hiding your money in Switzerland may not work so well anymore.
I worry lately that Limburgher has gone off his medication.
Is a New York State of Mind one of Confusion?
Still waiting for ORLY to weigh in. Or did his head explode?
I donft know about gJust go be with her,h but talk about your classic mid-life crisis.
And because I love you, Van Morrison.
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Faux News may finally be going down. Well, probably not, but a guy can dream, canft he?
Itfs not because of the political bullshit theyfve done over the years, or the lies and innuendo they make up and repeat, itfs because of Billy Mays. It turns out that the cause of tragic death of the worldfs favorite loud-mouthed pitchman was first reported as due to head trauma by Faux News, when they had no actual facts to back that up with. Even worse is that other major news outlets followed up with Fauxfs original reporting, assuming that they had actual confirmable knowledge – that they had done some actual investigative work. Instead, it was a few people in a newsroom saying ghe hit his head on that airplane earlier in the day – letfs run with thath. The other major news outlets were embarrassed by this, and theyfre letting Faux hang out to dry for it.
Thatfs right, they made it up – something they do all the time, but now apparently itfs personal because Ifm seeing a lot of chatter in the blog-o-sphere-o-rama about people who watch Faux on the weekends (because MSNBC does nothing but prison shows and CNN hasnft been the same since Ted lost control of it) are going to switch back to CNN – all because Faux screwed up on the reporting about Billy Mays.
Whodathunk it?
Cheap Shots:
Franken wins! For the 4th time in a single election. No we await that squelching sound which would represent ORLYfs head exploding. Itfs like the anticipation of 4th of July fireworks, isnft it?
Justice David Souterfs last day of work was today, and I have to say that all in all he was a pleasant surprise – one of the best moves of Bush the Elderfs presidency.
I was thinking the same thing yesterday, that maybe Lindsey Graham is the one to watch.
This is nothing we can be proud of. Itfs time to let the boy go.
Man, the ego on this guy. What I notice isnft as much the highlighted sections as the fact that despite everything he asks his constituents to think of him first, before his wife and children. Schmuck. I mean, I keep wanting to drop it and then he keeps making it impossible for a snarker like me to do so. Please dude. Didnft you see the scene in the wondrous Biography of Peter Sellers made for HBO when Sellers announces to his wife and children that he loved their mother, but he loved Sofia Loren more (which was a shock to Ms. Loren)? You remind me so much of how pathetic he seemed then.
And just where has Bubbles been during all of this? Same place hefs been for the past 4 years, in Florida.
This is truly well done. Ifm going to start referring to them as pro-consequences from now on.
Quite frankly, if you have to resort to gyoufre such a dickh to close your argument, no matter which side youfre on, youfve lost the argument.
Wow. Just freakinf wow.
As the great BillinPortlandMaine says, only 4 days until gTeabager II: Teabag Harder.h
The Marine Corps got their moneyfs worth with this one. Even I will salute as I pass by.
And I will salute this Colonel as well.
I wonder if the banking industry is as confused as I am by this decision that spanks them and was made by a strange collection of Supreme Oddfellows.
Dancing in the streets. Which version do you prefer? I like Van Halenfs myself, although the one Mick Jagger and David Bowie did has its moments.
Calling the current Governor of Florida gThe Republican Barney Frankh insinuates that the editors of the Wall Street journal know more than theyfve yet revealed. But the article itself is a piece of trash that lets you know just how far the famed WSJ has fallen since Rupurt Murdoch bought it.
gHey, Ifm Jeffreyh.
And because I love you, etil Tuesday – which a friend reminded me today how much I like.
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6/26/09 – I can still remember it
as if it were yesterday. My brother and I were watching some music video show – probably gSolid Goldh as MTv didnft yet exist. My friend Dave was visiting. My mom was making dinner. It was early evening but the sun hadnft gone fully down. We didnft have all the lights on, so it was a bit dark in the room. My mom had just turned on the lights in the dining room when the show was suddenly interrupted by a special news report.
I was standing behind the couch, about 3 feet behind it, somewhere near the phone. I can still picture it all, right down to the colors. My mom had just returned to the kitchen. My brother was on the couch. Dave was standing behind it, leaning over. And then we learned that John Lennon had been murdered. It took a few moments to set in, really. I mean, he had just put a new album out and to be honest, I wasnft all that fond of what I had heard from it (an opinion that has since changed). But there was a song of his that I truly loved, post Beatles. Not Imagine, but Number 9 Dream. That song was stuck in my head for weeks after.
I donft know if 30 years from now Ifll be able to say that I knew exactly where I was when Michael Jackson died. I donft remember where I was when Elvis died, for example, but in all fairness I was never a fan of his. But I am certain that 30 years from now there will be many who can tell you. The man had a huge impact on the entertainment world. He broke the color barrier on MTv – before him there were no black artists in rotation. He sold more albums than nearly everyone else combined. He was one of the first to help put a palatable face on AIDS, with his friendship of Ryan White. He founded USA for Africa, sending millions in relief during famine times (he co-wrote We Are The World). He made a nobody called Rockwell into a superstar by simply singing a single line in a song, which was looped into a chorus (you know the song, itfs featured in Geico commercials these days). He broke new ground – having the first feature-length music video. I saw Thriller in a movie theater myself. His original band, The Jackson Five, had 4 consecutive number 1 hits as their first 4 hits – a feat never done before or since. He had his first solo number 1 single at the age of 9, a song about a rat of all things. He made Eddie Van Halen mainstream (Beat It came before Van Halenfs breakthrough 1984 album).
For some people this is their John Lennon moment, just as John Lennonfs death is my Kennedy moment. Yesterday on the bus home there was a woman about my age on the bus listening to her iPod with tears streaming down her face. The young man sitting next to me was attempting to collage together a poem using lyrics to Jacksonfs songs. I do get how you feel.
Yeah, he was eccentric. Wildly so, in what appeared to outsiders as a vain attempt to gain the childhood he never had. He had all those surgeries. He may have died from an administered overdose of pain medication that hefs been taking since the accident that burned him in the mid 1980fs. Having had a serious burn myself I can tell you that the pain of that is unimaginable to those who havenft felt it. But face it, you donft know him and neither did I. We canft judge. Bill Wyman, no stranger to the life of stardom, has an interesting take on it all that is worth the read.
My wife is upset that Farah Fawcettfs untimely death is getting overlooked because Jackson died a few hours later. Okay, but there is an order of magnitude here. Fawcett was a pretty good actress and attractive if youfre into leggy blondes, but her fame seems to rest on a single poster and one year as part of Charliefs Angels and a career that declined almost immediately thanks to less-than-stellar turns in Loganfs Run and Saturn 3. Despite some pretty good acting after that (Burning Bed for example) itfs the Charliefs Angel thing shefs going to be remembered for. Not bad, certainly, but itfs not 7 top 10 singles from a single album.
One musician to another, you will be missed.
Gin and Tonic Cheap Shots:
Allow me to flog The Very Silly Mayor.
2 large oil firms, one based in Africa, and they called it Nigaz??!!!!?!?!!?!
The wait at my local DMV is shorter than the wait at the doctorfs office.
Yes, there is someone out there that Glen Beck thinks is even crazier than he is.
Weird, but today of all days we discover just how much of a straight white boy the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court really is.
Just what Louisiana needs, another Hurricane.
Apparently not only is Obama responsible for Sanfordfs affair, but he can travel through time as well. Limburgher is such a douchebag.
BTW Sanford, thanks for giving me a reason to keep kicking your ass (although Jesusf General did it better). David, youfre not. Ifm laying even money odds that your wife divorces you.
And because I love you I searched for my own personal favorite MJ song, for which there is no official video. Here it is.
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10:00am PST - You know what, fuck it. He was having an affair. Thatfs my opinion, and I have nothing to back that up with. But Ifll bet a paycheck on it.
11:00am PST – hefs late for the press conference.
11:15am PST – Soundcheck guy says, "Afghanistan, Argentina, check 1, check 2"
11:29am PST – He admits the affair with an Argentinean woman! Guess hefs not running for President in 2012. Oh, and pay up suckas!
11:31am PST – Resigns as leader of Republican Governors Association
11:33am PST – The wife has known for at least 5 months and itfs been going on for a year. Here come the tears! Oops, now theyfre gone again.
11:35am PST – did he just say he had an affair with a married woman?
11:40am PST – a reporter asks if hefs going to resign, and he walks away – although in fairness hefd been trying to wrap it up for a couple of minutes. A staffer says, ghe said enof.h
Okay, he used his office to perpetuate this – thatfs an impeachable offence in South Carolina, where adultery is actually a criminal offence. Misdirection, using staff to lie about his whereabouts and so on. The affair is one thing, but using his governmental office to lie about it is another. Bill Clinton lied by himself. The Governorfs office lied for him – using the lie he told them. People of South Carolina, you need to kick this fucker out. But what do I know? Ifm in California. Up to you.
Hell, even Faux News wants him to change political parties. At least we liberals donft go telling you how to set your moral standards before breaking them ourselves.
But one thing I notice from the press conference, and I saw it from beginning to end; he never said that he had ended the affair.
2:11pm PST – The wife finally issues a statement – they separated 2 weeks ago. She comes off well in the statement, with Obama-like coolness in her explanations.
Okay, now itfs just getting sad. After this posting Ifm not commenting further, unless therefs a worthy cheap shot to be had. Speaking of whichc
Cheap Shots:
Comment seen in a thread at DailyKos.com: gBreaking - Lou Dobbs of CNN outraged that Mark Sanford outsourced his mistress to a country South of the Border. Details on his show tonight.h
By the way, while you were all examining who was fucking who, an extraordinarily large terrorist attack happened on our watch. Priorities, people.
And this is the gGood War?h
17? With counterpoint from a former bass player for Frank Zappa.
Moving from 5 to 10. (or as Andrew O'Hehir over at Salon put it, gTwice the ass-kissing!h)
C Street isnft having a good week.
Wefre in the finals? Seriously? The Finals?
And because I love you, Tommy Emmanuel.
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Have you been playing the newest game? Where in the world is South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford!
Is he spending Fatherfs Day with his young children? No. Is he with his wife? No. Has he taken his cell phone with him? No. Has any of his security detail gone with him? No. Do the current posts on his twitter account look recent? No. Has he contacted any of his staff? No. Is he even in the state?
No.
Turns out that this gfather of the yearh candidate took this past weekend to hike the Appalachian Trail and clear his head. While tweeting about how much he hates the Stimulus Package hefs hiking on a trail that benefited from it, which according to him would probably give him cancer and put him on welfare. To quote Moses in an old Bill Cosby routine upon hearing that God is commanding him to build an Ark, gRiiiiiiighth.
He the Governor of a state for crying out loud. Sure he can take time off, and hefs allowed to. But he needs to be reachable at all times. He is responsible for an economy and upholding the laws of his state, and was elected by the people of South Carolina to be that person. A vacation is a fine thing, but going AWOL shows a lack of judgment that is downright appalling. And hefs supposed to wear a red and white striped shirt in these games.
What makes this something Ifm willing to comment on even more so than has already been done (hefs been gone 5 days as of this writing) is that hefs considered one of the front-runners for the Republican Presidential Nomination in 2012. A guy who slipped away for 5 days (it will be 7 total when he returns – according to the communiqués put out by his office – the man himself hasnft showed up) with no explanation could be doing anything. Just ask John Edwards. Sanfordfs out hiking the Appalachian Trail on Naked Hiking Day! Maybe thatfs why his wife hasnft heard from him in all this time. The fact that this is the best that the Republicant party can come up with right now (The guy who wants us to ignore volcanoes? The one who can see Russia (or at least Dutch Harbor) from her home? The guy who has kept us from having 100 Senators? The Naked Hiker? The man who once ate squirrel? See if you can name all 5!)
Their ranks are pretty pathetic right now. Look, everyone gaffes from time to time – just look at the Vice President. I always tell people that I allow myself one big mistake every day and Ifm fine with that being a good rule for anyone. But please people, these things compound geometrically. Youfve got about 18 months to find someone to run, and so far, you donft have that person.
The lies compound – is Governor Sanford even still in the country? Is he on the lam for something we know yet not of? Is he hiding? Is he running away? Has he been kidnapped and wefre hearing the words of someone who has assumed his place? Is he following the demands of a blackmailer? Has he been spotted on the grassy knoll? Is he the Lindbergh Baby? It gets kind of stupid, doesnft it?
Assuming no foul play, and that truly is my hope, is this really the best the Republicants can do?
Cheap Shots:
The real reason that single payer health care, despite being backed by 3 out of 4 people, isnft gaining traction yet.
All right, whofs in charge here?
Richard Nixon is apparently trying to catch up with Tupac and Biggie. Of course, they donft really make him look good.
Pat Bukanon wants us all to speek Amerukan.
Are there 11 Doctors in the house?
I guess Johnny needed his sidekick back.
Mailbox Kitty is w4chin Ur Netflix!
DiFi, I voted for you and probably would again, but you blew it on this one.
Yeah, but you have to live in Arkansas.
And because I love you, Paul Simon.
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I've been absent for a few days, sorry about that. Couldn't be helped. I had what is called in the professional lingo, a "double". An Upper GI exam and a Colonoscopy. They used the same instrument for both, and I joked with the doctor that he needed to do the GI first.
I've known that I would need a colonoscopy sometime in my early 40s since I was 16 years old. One of my most vivid memories is the day in the summer before I turned 16 when my father sat me down and told me he had colon cancer. I was still in a way getting over being "the kid who lived" - I had left behind schools that still had teachers who remembered my older sister (who died when I was 4) by simply living longer, and my grandmother was dying already, but these weren't as personal as my father telling me he was going to die. I barely remembered my sister, I hated my dad's mother. But my dad - while he was away more often than not (my parents divorced when I was 7) he was still dad. I spent my summers with the man. I wasn't old enough yet to appreciate how big of an asshole he was, but I was old enough to appreciate how much of one he was in my favor. And he had cancer.
My dad lasted a long time with colon cancer. He picked up some others along the way; stomach, skin, lung, liver. He was a stubborn SOB, he fought it a long time, but the final memories I have of him are lying in a hospital bed, half his former size (he was an imposing man in his prime), yellowed skin, and coughing up black blood by the liter.
My dad smoked heavily. He drank heavily. He fought addiction in his younger days and experimented with crazy things like Laetrile as he got sicker. All of these things I never did. After I hit drinking age every once in a while he'd show up and we go out and get bombed - in his case to kill the pain and in my case to prove I could keep up with him (I couldnft). He could be a real shitheel then, just ask my little brother, but he was sick and I gave him allowances for it. But he got diagnosed too late to just cut the cancer cells out, and he fought it as best he could, but ultimately he wound up ignoring my brother and crying on my shoulder a lot more than a parent ever should.
My dad was pretty selfish.
So I decided long long ago that I would do everything in my power to get early detection, if for no other reason than to not burden my wife and my kids with what would be an awful experience. It took some convincing at first with various doctors. I'm only 44 years of age and I've been trying to get one of these since I turned 40. I finally got a referral to a doctor named Aristotle who actually listened to my family history and he scheduled it without hesitation.
Now for the other end. Ask anyone who knows me; I cough. I have since I was 8 years old. I have been diagnosed with fluid in the lungs, asthma, emphysema, allergies, cold weather sensitivity... none of which was accurate. Every time a new treatment would be tried it would work for a short time, then my cough would return. A lot of people would get frustrated with it, but I got used to it. I hardly even noticed my cough any more. Then two years ago I went in for a physical and the doctor noticed my cough. "How long have you had it?" "34 years," I replied, rather flippantly. After goggling at me a moment they started tests, and that was when it was discovered that I had a lump in my thyroid. 4 months later, I had no thyroid at all and a small scar on my neck.
Of course, this wasn't the cause of my cough, so we went back to it. We decided to try something different - acid reflux medication. And lo and behold, it worked! I've now been 18 month nearly cough free (knock on silicon polymer plastic). But what this means is that I've had acid reflux, not very strong but still there, for over 30 years. Aristotle wanted to take a look, and he scheduled the procedure for the same day, which lead to my joke earlier.
On a side note, I've discovered throughout my life that doctors with interesting names get things done and done well. When I dislocated my shoulder, it was Doctor Uncyk who saw to my recovery. The man who removed my thyroid was named Electron (he has siblings named Proton and Neutron - Electron now works for President Obama – no joke). This doctor is named Aristotle. My primary care physicians are twin sisters.
The prep is awful. Clear liquids the day before and you have to drink over a gallon of a viscous liquid the consistency of Jell-O shots that winds up with you pooping clear and every few minutes. It doesn't seem so bad at first, but after your 13th 8 ounce drink in 3 hours it really wears you down. And of course now is the time that our annual visit from hellfs mockingbird arrives - it's a single bird that nests a few doors down, and is louder than a Pink Floyd concert. He starts singing about 11pm and finishes about 9am. Try sleeping through that.
Anyway, next morning we got to the clinic (you're required to have someone drive you home and it IS necessary) where the procedure was done and knew we were in for an interesting time. One of the doctors at the clinic, which is around the corner from our first apartment here in San Francisco, has the same name as me. You get to put on the non-privacy gown, and they hook up an IV for you. Eventually you're wheeled into the room and the put the anesthesia in the IV. It made me cough like hell, but it subsided after a moment or two. I remember the scope going down my throat. I remember it coming back out. The period in between is a blank. I remember the tubing coming back out after the colonoscopy, but nothing before. I woke up in recovery groggy as all hell and my wife looking at pictures of my insides. Colon, clean. Esophagus, a bit of wear after 30 years plus of acid reflux - they took a biopsy and I'll know the results in a week.
The insides were pretty rumbly for a while and I burped like crazy for about a day – the side effect of having nothing inside you other than air.
So Ifve had a pretty strenuous couple of days. Ifve had tubes stuck in both ends, spent a day on the toilet, drank 8 pounds of fluids and then promptly passed them through again, and couldnft think coherently for a day. And it was all worth it and Ifll do it again in a couple of years. Ifll be back to normal (finally) next week. So, how was your week?
And because I love you, Joe Jackson.
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6/12/09 – Keep your damned guns.
Ifm a liberal and Ifm proud of it. But Ifm not one who wants to take away the guns. Ifm not sure that a hunter needs an AK-47 to tenderize his meat, but in terms of owning guns it really doesnft interest me to take away the guns people legally buy for whatever legal reason. I favor waiting periods, mandatory classes, strict controls on exporting weapons to private citizens, trigger locks, keeping guns away from convicted felons, that sort of thing (how does G. Gordon Liddy have a gun permit?) but you can keep your damned guns. I learned to shoot as a child myself. My dad owned several guns. My mom owned a gun.
I donft want your fucking guns, all right? Get over it already. Itfs far too late to try to ban them now – that ship has sailed. I happen to agree with you – enforce the laws we already have.
But Ifm not a member of the NRA and never will be. Ifll get into the whys and wherefores of that in a moment but I have a question I need to ask first. Why is it that these right-wing domestic terrorists that have been killing cops, museum guards, doctors and plotting against politicians and so forth all come from the same position on gun ownership as the NRA? Not all of them have been members, but some have been. They all support the NRAfs logic on gun ownership. So how is it that the NRA harbors so many terrorists?
I donft support the NRA because there is a flaw in their logic. The 2nd amendment of the Constitution states that the public has the right to bear arms in order to form a militia. The problem is the word gmilitiah. Back in the day when those words were written that word meant gmilitaryh. People joined the army/military from their homes and they brought their own gear with them. Eventually we got to the point that our military could afford its own weapons and this became redundant, but at the time the words were written down the word gmilitiah meant gthe armed forces that protect our great nationh.
gMilitiah doesnft mean that any more. Words change. "Gangbanger" (for example) used to mean the guys who tried to shut the gangs down, not gang members themselves. gMilitiah can now mean anything from a group of people who validly protect their property rights to any group of morons who donft like paying taxes. Militias arenft regulated by the government while the military obviously is. The NRAfs big problem is that it has embraced and been embraced by the militia movement – a movement that says any group of people can gather for the violent protection of their rights. Do you know what a group of people with some anger in it is called? A mob.
And mobs do stupid things. Mobs get people killed.
A person doesnft have to be in a crowd of people to be affected by this mentality. They can be one of tens and tens of people who watch some blowhard on television and feel that anger. And already have the guns. The Holocaust Museum murderer isnft a glone wolfh as Ifve been hearing in recent days. He isnft a mob of one. Hefs part of a large group of people - many of whom have probably never met. He feels he is part of a movement – a militia. He has his guns and feels he has support of people like these blowhards and the NRA for his actions. I guarantee you that this man doesnft feel like hefs a loner. The man who killed Dr. Tiller certainly doesnft act like he thinks hefs a loner – he believes hefs part of a movement.
Which brings me back to my point about not being a member of the NRA. They have embraced the idea that it is okay to own guns for precisely this purpose, so that people can be part of militias. Mobs. This creates people like the murderers who have made headlines over the past two weeks, and this is unacceptable.
Keep your guns. Hunt. Protect your home. Ifm all in favor of that. But supporting militias gets people killed.
Cheap Shots (itfs gin and tonic Friday!):
Turn in your bible. You are not a man of God.
Ifm sure this isnft what the Mamas & the Papas has in mind.
Usually the son of a jackass is also a jackass. Not so here.
Atrios, as usual, is brief and to the point. Do you know what small business really means?
And because I love you, I need you, I gots to gots to have you child, Ides of March.
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6/11/09 – nuthinf much to sayc
And I mean it. Everyone is still simmering over the shooting at the Holocaust Museum yesterday. I donft have anything constructive to add here.
Cheap shots:
How does one laugh cruelly at the fat white rich man and point with derision in Spanish?
And because I love you, Queensryche.
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6/10/09 – Terrorism
again.
Ifve been trying to think of what to write today, and Ifm not really getting
anywhere. My in-laws are in town and we get along pretty good, so my dander
isnft up about much. And then some jackass shoots up the Holocaust Memorial.
What kkkind of sickkk fukkk do you have to be
to do this?
Holy shit, this guy was fucking nuts. Even
Shepard Smith gets that.
And this guy is exactly what a study authorized by the Bush administration and released by the Obama administration warned about. Some right-wing lunatics are going to start shooting people – and they have been, all because they disagree with their political views. To Glen Beck, Michelle Malkin, Rush Limburgher, Bill ORLY et al, that report wasnft about you, but maybe it should have been. As I discussed yesterday you idiots have been responsible for creating the atmosphere that these people feel they need to act.
The world hasnft really changed since Obama took office. Wall Street still operates. Cars are still being sold. Changes are being discussed, but most havenft been implemented yet. There is no Socialist/Fascist/Muslim/Whatever agenda going on here – we liberals (and Obama is NOT one of us) are working within the framework of the Constitution to try to affect change. Wefre not doing anything you havenft done yourselves.
Except we havenft lied about it, or lied about your motives. Or encouraged anyone to kill someone.
We want this country to be
great. And I do mean GREAT. We want us to lead the world into the future. The
world continually changes, but you people who inspire a man who has held racist
views for 88 years to suddenly act NOW are terrorists.
Cheap Shots:
George W. Bush,
Secret Muslim.
Contessa Brewer makes my friends list today.
Wow.
Using Prayer Effectively.
I must thank actor John Voigt, for making a list of a majority of the public people I think should be arrested for supporting terrorism.
Add this site to your favorites. You wonft regret it.
And because I love you, the music that allowed me to mellow out today – She and Him.
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You might have noticed by now that Ifm the type to push envelopes. I will push buttons, and call out hypocrisy as I see fit. Today is no exception.
Bill ORLY and a number of others, many of whom are on Faux News and right-wing talk radio (including Rush Limbaugh) should be arrested and thrown in jail on Federal Charges. The charge? Conspiracy to commit terrorism. Thatfs right, Ifm calling them terrorists. Michelle Malkin? Terrorist. Ann Coulter? Terrorist. Michael Steele. Terrorist.
Now get pictures of Muslims and people with darker skin out of your head. Ifm talking about a very specific and narrow brand of terrorism – the kind that leads to doctors getting killed. This isnft about left or right politics although I will readily concede that most of these people are right-wingers. Ifm talking about people who applaud the murder or abortion doctors. Ifm talking about people who support the aims of Operation Rescue. Ifm talking to people who contribute to the atmosphere that lead to the death of a Doctor in Kansas last month.
ORLY liked to say that some people called that Doctor gTiller the baby Killerh. News flash Bill, you called him that. You suggested in your words that he was acting outside the law when in fact he was doing nothing wrong according to our legal system. You suggested that a person had a moral obligation to break the law in order to do what you believed was morally correct. Itfs no different than what the killers of 9/11 did. Itfs terrorism.
I hate tagging the word domestic on to the front of the term when we refer to an American-born murderer. I dislike elevating crime even on this scale to give the murderer in question an important title, such as gterroristh. It implies that there is an understandable gain. Well, if you think the gain is understandable, youfre a terrorist too.
Aiding and abetting is the phrase. Facilitating murder. Theyfve all done it. They should all be arrested, charged, and tried by a jury of their peers (Ifd be disqualified – Ifm not their peer, Ifm a better person). Itfs not about silencing the right-wing critics of the left although that would be a nice side-effect. Itfs about shutting up those who aid and abet murder, and only shutting them up about that. Although Ifd like them to shut up about everything, under the current rules theyfve got the right.
But for their support of terrorist activities, they belong in jail.
Cheap Shots:
Ah, scale.
The blowing up of Detroit really belongs to the previous administration.
And because I love you, a band named after a brand of dildo singing about illegal abortions. And here is Manfred Mannfs Earth Band performing a Bruce Springsteen song on the same topic.
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6/5/09 – Questions that need answers
I found this at digbyfs site today, and Ifm helping to spread the word. The original post was by Jack Balkin, discussing what we should be able to do with suspected domestic terrorist Scott Roeder (5 paragraphs):
"(1) Should the United States
be able to hold Roeder without trial in order to prevent him from returning to
society to kill more abortion providers? If we believe that Roeder and other
domestic terrorists will plan further attacks on abortion providers and abortion
clinics if we let them free, can we subject them to indefinite detention?
(2) The Obama Administration is currently considering a national security court
to make decisions about the detention of suspected terrorists, with the power to
order continued preventive detention. Should this court be able to hear cases
involving U.S. citizens, whether they are Muslim or Christian? (...)
(4) One of the most important reasons for detaining terrorists (suspected or
otherwise) is to obtain information about future terrorist attacks that may save
lives and prevent future bombings. To procure this information, can the
government dispense with the usual constitutional and legal safeguards against
coercive interrogation? Should it be able to subject Roeder to enhanced
interrogation techniques, including waterboarding and other methods, to
determine whether Roeder knows of any other persons who are likely to commit
violence against abortion clinics or against abortion providers in the future?
Would your answer change if you believed that an attack on an abortion provider
or a bombing of an abortion clinic was imminent?
(5) Terrorists and terrorist organizations need money and resources to operate
effectively. Often the only way to stop them is to dry up their sources of
financial and logistical support. Can the U.S. government freeze the assets of
pro-life organizations and make it illegal to contribute money to a pro-life
charity that it believes might funnel money or provide material support to
persons like Roeder or to organizations that practice violence against abortion
providers? Can the government arrest, detain, and seize the property of
anti-abortion activists who helped Roeder in any way in the months leading up to
his crime, for example by giving him rides or allowing him to stay in their
homes?"
These are pretty good questions. After all, President Obama, like the 43 men who came before him, took an oath to protect the country and the constitution for all enemies, foreign or domestic. I remember those words quite well and every President in my memory has said those very words. So I have a follow-up question:
Do we only do this to foreigners?
Cheap Shots (get yer Gin and Tonic ready):
Um, Cover Editors at The National Review, did you start drinking early? This will make a great Olbermann WTF moment. See how many forms of racism you can see in this picture.
It ainft Profumo, but this doesnft look good for Gordon.
What this article doesnft talk about is that his Great Uncle helped liberate it.
This guy should be arrested. Maybe even treated to the same questions as above. But I notice that he wasnft smart enough to go John Malkovich, let alone Galt.
Um, dude, you should get a fair trial and all, but using the father from The Family Guy or Homer Simpson as your moral outrage center is just stupid. Dude, itfs just a freakinf cartoon.
Ms. Buchanan, glynchingh means ghung by the neck until deadh, not gbeing sent to prison for assaulting a fellow human being.h
As much as it pains me to say it, Go Gators.
Hit delete man, hit delete!
To give you an idea of how bad Fox gNewsh is with their reporting, read this. Then read back to me anywhere it states that we may be sending Al Gore to North Korea except by Fox gReportersh. Of course, given the audiencec
By comparison, Elie Wiesel has really got a way with words.
And because I love you, Roger Waters (with Don Henley).
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6/4/09 – I had it with you assholes
I want all of you opposed to Sotomayorfs nomination to the Supremes to just come out and admit it. Itfs not about racism. Itfs not about her decisions. Itfs not about a paper she gave as a college freshman. Itfs not about comments she made in a speech. Itfs not about her temper, perceived or otherwise. Itfs not about La Raza. Itfs not about empathy. Itfs not about her moderate savings account. Itfs not about her very compelling story. Itfs not about affirmative action. Itfs not about activism.
Itfs about abortion. Please people, man up about it. Itfs about abortion! You donft really give a shit about any of the other things, you want to know where she stands on Roe vs. Wade - the Limburghur himself today admitted as much. The public record is pretty slim and you donft know what to think.
You know what? Fuck you. Fuck you and your dates. Ifm quoting John Belushi there, from when I was a kid and saw the Blues Brothers perform. He said it at the audience, to which Dan Ackroyd followed up with, gKeep in mind that there are 13 of us up here on stage and only one of you.h I can still remember the pain from laughing so hard.
Fuck you people. Youfre outnumbered. Most of this nation believes in the right to choose. We may like abortion itself – we may wish there were fewer performed – but we do not want the right to have one impinged.
Fuck you people. You have no moral center. You proclaim for weeks that you canft support Judge Sotomayor because of her graceh. Then you say as long as shefs against abortion then we can live with the rest. Fuck all you for hypocrisy.
Fuck you people. You want her held accountable for being empathetic when you loved it about John Roberts.
Fuck you people. The two currently serving justices who are the greatest activists – i.e. overturning laws – are Thomas and Alito.
Itfs about abortion. Admit it. Say it. Stop dicking around with other memes. Itfs about the one thing thatfs a deal-breaker for you, on an issue you lost over 3 decades ago and simply havenft figured out yet. That means youfre a fucking idiot.
And with all this fucking, therefs bound to be an unwanted pregnancy in there somewhere. Quick! Take 9 months out of your life and have your body radically changed in order to satisfy someone elsefs moral code. Quick! Take the rest of your life and raise a child that you donft love right now. Quick! Allow someone else to decide the quality of life and the quality of how it ends for your terminally ill and as of yet unborn child (yo, thatfs what Dr. Tiller helped people do – fuck you for saying otherwise).
Men, if you think you can possibly imagine what any of that would be like then youfre suffering from brain damage. Call Dr. House. Men shouldnft be allowed to decide this one. I know several women who have had abortions – women who I call friends. Theyfre good people and I canft even begin to imagine what it was like for them. Fuck you for presuming to say theyfre not good people. Theyfre loved by friends and family and if theyfre not loved by you they will somehow muddle through.
So admit it – your real questions about Sotomayor are about abortion. To say otherwise is dishonest and makes you look fucking stupid. Not that this is anything new.
Cheap Shots:
All in all, not a bad bit of speechifyinf. The man is verbose, Ifll give him that.
Fuck you too, Jill Stanek who lives atc I have the address, but Ifm classier than you.
Goodbye, Grasshopper.
Thatfs my Nancy!
Still trying to understand Cheneyfs logic? Perhaps one of Ross Perotfs flowcharts will help.
Donft they warn Christianists about idol worship?
Cheap Trick is seriously old school.
There is always another point of view.
Do you get the impression that there just might be some more attorney firings?
And because I love you, The Posies.
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Hi, Satan here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Ifm writing a blog today. The owner of the body Ifm inhabiting for a few minutes today doesnft normally post on Mondays, so Ifm taking over to put down a few thoughts about the death of Dr. George Tiller, the abortion doctor gunned down in his own church.
First of all, to the killer of this doctor – have you not read any Shakespeare? One of the things that eventually drives Hamlet and everyone else to ruin is that he realizes that because the killer of his father is praying he canft kill him right then, even though he had wrathful vengeance, because he would be forgiven for his sins as he died while in prayer. Good work asshole, Dr. Tiller isnft mine now – not that he ever was. But you are. Yeah, I recognize that you will be praying when youfre executed by the state. But vengeance wasnft yours to exact in the first place, if it was even appropriate here. Only the big guy can do that – believe me, I know.
I read the end of the Book, he wins. He should – even I love the guy. But thatfs a while off yet, and youfre going to be mine until then. Trust me, itfs going to give you a whole new perspective.
People like Randall Terry, Bill OfReilly, Troy Newman, and the many others who gave up Dr. Tiller, theyfre mine too. Pride, Sitting in judgment, and in OfReillyfs case Sloth (a lot of you have that issue). These guys arenft the ones who get to do that. I also get Rush Limbaugh, but that happened long before he became famous. Well, actually, therefs some cause and effect with that one.
Therefs lots of good people I wonft be getting my hands on. George Clooney for one. I also lost out on getting Marilyn Monroe – the big guy is a pretty damned good poker player. Do you honestly think that any of these people want to spend eternity with the likes of Randall Terry and the like? That would be hell for them – which is one of the reasons Ifm getting them. Mr. Terry, you really havenft had hot and crispy wings until youfve had mine.
Of course, that could all change. Like Bill Clinton, the big guy believes in death-bed conversions. Hefs also got a sense of humor. I know he plans to show up as a woman when OfReilly kicks the bucket, just so he can see the look on his face – a trick he uses with suicide bombers all the time. With a little luck, Ifll be there too. Hey, Ifm at war with him, but itfs civilized.
On a side note, in his capacity as Allah hefs only granted the 73 virgins thing 4 times that I know of – and 3 of them aren't anyone youfve heard of. He offered it to Gandhi and the skinny little dude laughed and said, goffer them to Ben Kingsley – I wish to see my wife.h Handing out virgins is more my thing. I get the terrorists and I donft give a damn abut their personal or religious beliefs. One of the big guyfs big rules is to love the sinners. So many of you break that rule that I get more business than I can handle sometimes.
And I love Ray Wisefs portrayal of me. The guy who cancelled gReaperh and I will have a meeting soon.
And because I love all you sinners and future long-term guests of my domain, I present the 2008 Billboard top 25.
Oh, and bearing false witness is also a big no-no.
You people make me laugh sometimes.
One this is posted I will disengage myself from this atheist and let him try to explain what happened here when he looks at this page tomorrow. Yes, Ifm evil. Get over it.
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Therefs been a lot of press about how Obama changed his mind at nearly the last minute and decided not to release further photos of abuse at Abu Graib Prison. Hefs taken a lot of flack for it and for his explanation, that it would endanger the troops. This move is very much unlike him, so it would seem, for all of his calls for transparency. And on the surface I would agree. The rumors have been about some of the most graphic depravities you could possibly imagine and it would have a chilling effect. Obamafs taken a lot of heat over his decision from people on the left. But he wonft from me. Not yet.
As Ifve said before, Obama plays a longer game than most politicians. He will say something that seems outrageous only to be proven right months later. Hefs careful with information, something few of his predecessors have been. I think therefs a strategy behind this and it has little to do with politics. I think hefs doing something about these photos before we see them. What that something is Ifm not really sure. If I were to guess it would be to take the time to identify the soldiers and contractors responsible for the abuse and inform them that theyfre going to be charged with crimes. I have no evidence to really back this up, but my gut tells me that if he were to do this and then release the photos, the anger isnft directed at all of our servicemen and women, just the ones who probably deserve it. If we can show the world that we are actually doing something about the abusers – the actual people who wielded the billy clubs and raped the children – the world just might respect us a bit more than they do right now.
But it would take along game to pull that off, and silence from the executive branch right now, until all of the ducks are in a row. Again, I have nothing to support this but it does make sense. Obama plays a long game when he needs to.
Of course I could be wrong – wouldnft be the first time. All you need do is read some of my older articles to see proof of that. But I do think that he's waiting for something...
Friday Gin and Tonic cheap shots:
Peaches & Herb are working together again. This is a cool article about Herb.
Herefs words I never thought Ifd write: General Petreaus, you rock!
Does this mean I get to call her Machine-Gun SotomayOR?
How did this guy get parole again?
Will something finally get done?
And because I love you Little River Band.
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Yeah, I took a day off to deal with personal issues. I also wanted to have my ducks in order before I wrote this one, and there were sooo many ducks out there.
Already the stupid ones are calling Judge Sotomayor a racist. Has anyone other than me noticed that every single one of the people who are calling her a racists are white? Hmmmm, I detect a pattern here. The number of white people in this country who have the right to lecture about racism espoused by a minority can be counted on fewer than one finger. How many of you who are white and read this column understand why Mookie threw the trash can through the window towards the end of Spike Leefs gDo the Right Thingh? I have yet to meet a white person who understood it, myself included. I have yet to meet a person of color in this country who didnft understand it.
What we whites do not have is the common experience necessary to lecture on race. I can come a bit of the distance towards it thanks to my long hair – which Ifve worn even when it wasnft fashionable growing up in a place where being different could get you beat up during lunch at school – but I havenft had to experience it for a lifetime knowing that my parents, my relatives, their parents and so on going back generations have experienced the same thing. I simply donft have a common frame of reference.
So Beck, Limburger, Coulter, Trancero, Newt, and all of the rest of you who have made this claim over the past two days, shut the fuck up. At least youfve never been in danger of being killed or beaten up for the color of your skin. Calling Sotomayor a racist is in and of itself, racist. The fact that youfre too stupid to recognize this fact excludes you from being able to have a meaningful conversation about it.
Newt, youfre Tweeting from Auschwitz? Seriously?
I wonder if the whole ghot-blooded Latinah meme out there promoted by these people has anything to do with how they want their housekeepers to be.
Complaining about how to pronounce her name? Yeah, thatfs racist too. Ask Guy Hebert (pronounced Gee E-bear).
As this woman points out, being against Sotomayor is being against family – it will backfire.
Oh, and did Huckleberry call her gMariah because he had fantasies of gWest Side Storyh? She is Puerto Rican, after all. Um, thatfs also racist. Besides, Ifve seen it – you canft dance.
Um, Pat Buchannan, are you even trying? Yeah, you know all about success in politics given all of your failures in even getting a party nomination forc well, anything, but to say she doesnft compare favorably to Harriet Meyers? The stupidest thing President Drunken Chimp did in an impossibly stupid 8 year run? Dude, we can tell when youfre phoning it in.
Um, Tancredo, the nooses kinda make a difference. I bet La Raza has never attempted to set fire to a cross on your lawn. Or anyonefs lawn for that matter.
Oh noes! She likes mustard on fish!
Oh noes, she might not be smart because she was top of her class!
Oh noes! She hasnft become rich with her Judgefs salary!
On noes! She was a cute child!
Oh noes! She helped set in motion the events that helped Barry Bonds break the home run record!
On noes! As this rather snarky post points out, Sotomayor was NOT the beneficiary of affirmative action, having attended a private Catholic High School that wasnft under itfs jurisdiction.
Oh noes! The empathetic-growing-up-poor-child-of-immigrants argument has already been used! (Actually, Ms. Sotomayorfs parents were American Citizens).
Oh wait, so now shefs a child of privilege?
Look, do you really want to understand Judge Sotomayor? Read this. I donft always agree with her decisions, but she is a well-reasoned jurist. My problems with Alito, Scalia, Roberts and Thomas arenft that theyfre conservatives – my problem with them is that their politics influence their decisions and that they tend not to be well-reasoned. They are, in fact, the very things that Republicrats continually complain about – activist judges. Souter is well-reasoned, and a conservative. OfConnor was well-reasoned, and a conservative. Both were good justices. (And for the record, Ifm a liberal – I know what one acts like. Neither Souter nor OfConnor are liberals. Neither is Sotomayor, when you look at her record.)
And Ifm not just making this up either. According to one Yale law Professor (oh noes! Sotomayorfs alma mater) the most activist judge in recent court history is Clarence Thomas. Third on the list is Antonin Scalia.
Deep thought #27, from Eschaton.
Cheap shots:
This is what they really fear. If you watch the video at work do not be surprised if your cubicle-mates stare at you for the sudden outbursts of laughter.
Oh, what a breath of fresh air this man truly is.
Bill Clinton, drawing an unintentional (perhaps) metaphor between GW and Saddam Hussein.
Proof that Democrats too can have blinders as big as can be imagined and live in the State of Denial. Yes, hefs a crook and a schnook and should be tossed out on his ear.
Fully staffed, baby.
Cutie! (oh noes! Does Sotomayor belong to his church? I await that juicy rumor.)
Are you up for the challenge Arlen?
Teh stupid! It burnz! It burnz like hygiene!
20 years ago a friend of mine was nearly killed.
Was it the 9 people killed or the $70 Million lost that caused the philosophical switch?
Limberger must be sharing his Oxytocin stash.
Yiipie Kayay (you know the next word)!
No one saw the financial crash coming? Letfs go back into the wayback machine 13 years and discover the Born Identity.
Liz Cheney on gEnhanced Marriage Techniquesh. Denies Gay Marriage is Torture.
I love the gSinatra Shoth of Obama here.
And because I love you, an amazing performance by Neil Finn.
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Well, youfve probably heard it by now – the California Supremes this morning handed down the ruling that says that Same Sex Marriage is illegal – that Prop 8 was a legitimate proposal and passed legally. They also said that the 18,000 or so couples who got married while it was legal are still to be considered married. Um, that should create some interesting paperwork for the government.
Ifve written before about the stupidity of the people against gay marriage. If they honestly believe that this will cause problems with straight marriage, Ifd like these people to spell out the steps. They canft without making a false argument – whatfs next?
If we approve gay marriage, whatfs next? Polymoral marriages (more than 2 people)? Beastiality? Where does it stop? Well, fuck all of you – these arguments are false. The gays arenft asking for their rights to be a stepping stone to something else – theyfre asking for a finish line. And they deserve one.
When the appellate court held up Proposition 8 there was a huge demonstration here in San Francisco, as you might expect. I wasnft there – my son had a class assignment that night at the Randall Museum, which sits on a hill above the Castro, so I watched the whole thing unfold from above it. As protests go, it was a thing of wonder, and it inspired me to write a song that I havenft yet released. Ifm going to go into the studio this week and work on the song and maybe release it as a single. I think it encapsulates everything I think about this whole damned issue. I present the lyrics to you now, in solidarity of those who wish, like I am now, to be married.
OMAR
I was standing on top of the hill, the marchers spread out below me
Drowning out helicopters like I did in my working days
Shouting out slogans of thought about love, decrying separate but equal
No water guns, but a civil escort insteadc
I was named after Omar Khayyam like my father was, and his father was
Sent off to Persia to figure out the right from the wrong
They didnft ask and I didnft tell and still some secrets were spilled
I was sent home and now they say I have dishonorc
(Chorus)
So I be written in the Book of Love,
I do not care about that Book above.
Erase my name or write it as you will,
So I be written in the Book of Love.
All I ever wanted to be was a soldier like my father was and his father was
A third generation to serve the land of our birth
I have good skills they were put to good use I did my job with pride
But I was sent home like something of lesser worth
(Repeat Chorus)
(Instrumental Break)
I was named after Omar Khayyam like my father was, and grandfather was
A series of tributes that probably ends with me
But maybe not; where therefs love there is hope, and hope – he never dies
So I will walk down from the hill and join in the pridec
(Repeat Chorus twice and out)
Words and Music © 11/11/08 by Chris Reed, BMI, All Rights Reserved, save for the Chorus Lyrics, taken from the Rubaiyaat of Omar Khayyam
Cheap Shots:
"De todas las maneras posibles de imaginar, Sonia Sotomayor ha vivido el sueño americano. "Será la primera latina en la Corte Suprema de Justicia, la tercera mujer y la única jueza en la corte actual que tiene experiencia en las cortes judiciales."
We all have to learn how to properly pronounce Sotomayor – I got it wrong the first time I tried.
Teh stoopid, it burnsc
A guide to what wefre really talking about in the confirmation process.
RIP, Jay Bennet.
Um, Huckleberry, her name is Sonia.
Um, I thought the other guy was the comedian.
Remember when Fox gNewsh tried to create a comedy show to go against The Daily Show? You donft? Thatfs okay. Remembering this after itfs gone will be just as easy.
Remember, listen to the General on the ground.
Is the Republicrat base really that scared? Is the Democratic base this pathetic? Remembers, numb3rs can be skewed to mean just about anything.
Up or down vote? Anyone else remember 2005?
And because I love you, Terry Nunn (Berlin) and Dave Navarro (Janefs Addiction) perform some Olivia Newton-John.
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And I return with a rare Monday posting. I apologize for the absence but others have taken up the slack well enough recently. I'll be taking tomorrow off (election day) but then hopefully on Wednesday things will be back to normal.
If you havenft seen this fucking outrage yet, take some time and do so: http://men.style.com/gq/features/topsecret These are the cover sheets for Defense Department updates about the war in Iraq that were written by Don Rumsfeld and sent to a select few, including President Drunken Chimp. You think the Muslim world isnft going to be pissed at us over this? There are going to be cries of Jihad and mistrust and it will be our fault.
Don Rumsfeld isnft known for his piety. He goes to church the same as I do – never. But he understood his boss well enough to include some pretty hardcore bible quotes to keep the temper up on the war. We have a confluence of events here – the man wanted the war badly, and was willing to do what it took to make it happen and to keep it going, including manipulating a man who quoted the bible for just about everything he did. Lot of people are writing about this and GQfs article is probably going to blow the roof off, but I want to point out something everyone else has missed: He knew his audience.
President Drunken Chimp didnft want just a war, he wanted a Holy War. He wanted a Crusade. Now to us that might not mean all that much, but to the Muslim world, a world with a longer history than that of the United Stated (by about 6-fold) it equates to attempted extermination. The original crusades werenft really about King John and Robin Hood. It was about the Catholic Churchfs desire to wipe out a popular upstart religion and kill or subjugate every Muslim on the planet. Textbooks refer to them as Turks and Persians, but what they were is about being Muslim. Americans are always going to be looked at with more than a modicum of suspicion because thanks to the policies of the President before Obama the Muslim world has come to equate the attempted extermination of their entire way of life with US.
Thatfs a label Ifd rather not wear, but thanks to this man and those who manipulated him, thatfs just how it is. Terrorism nearly becomes understandable under those conditions.
There is a great episode of The West Wing called Isaac and Ishmael, written in direct response to 9/11, in which the character of Josh describes how he would punish terrorists, by showing them pictures of the people they killed and then letting their relatives each punch them in the mouth once a day. Seems a fitting punishment for George W. Bush, Don Rumsfeld, and all of these other sons of bitches.
On another topic, tomorrow is election day here in California. There are a couple of congress races (not where I live) but the big deal is the 6 budget propositions that would re-allocate moneys from future budgets to the current one. They all suck and should all be voted down. That way, if nothing else, the legislature canft come back 2 years from now and say that this is what the voters wanted. Yeah, borrowing from the education fund two years from now is such a great idea.
The problem with Californiafs budget is the process itself. Proposition 13 makes it possible for a very small minority and this year as little as one person control the passage of a budget. We require a 2/3 majority to pass budget bills in California. Thatfs just plain dumb. Prop 13 should be repealed.
Cheap Shots:
Enough with the Obama as Spock stuff already. Yes, I liked the movie.
I thought Rush already had Steelefs balls.
It can happen to anyone.
Never, ever, ever screw with someone whose mom has bigger hueveos than you do.
Every time we think about that 59/60 vote threshold, you need to remember this. Yeah, itfs tasteless, but itsf true.
@WTF – watching Newt Gingrich make an ass of himself. Again.
So let me see now, we tortured a guy to give us lies?
Barack Rocks the Irish.
Run away! Run away! Bwahahahahah!
Face it MO, you screwed up.
I guess this means that Dick Cheney didnft/doesnft practice law.
And because I love you and sticking with the theme, Todd Rundgren – from the only album ever released that the user can re-mix on the fly.
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Okay, who saw that coming? Okay, a few did, because he hadnft hired any clerks for next year, but Justice David Souterfs retirement so early in the Obama administration is one hell of a gift. Yes, hefs a moderate voice, appointed by a Republican, and we get to replace him with whomever we want with the proper qualifications. Therefs a ton of lobbying already underway. Of course, I have a suggestion, one I see no one making seriously.
Appoint William Jefferson Clinton.
Ooh, that squelching sound was Bill ORLYfs head exploding.
Now, 42 was never a judge but he was a lawyer and has passed the bar in a couple of states. He does have a solid understanding of the law (letfs set aside the impeachment for a moment) and although conservatives hate the man, he has all of the qualities that President Obama said he is looking for in Souterfs replacement. Former politicians who have never been judges have joined the Supreme Court before, so this is nothing new – Warren Berger turned out to be great at it despite him fairly dismal record as Governor of California. Clinton understands Constitutional Law about as well as anyone does (and now you can count the impeachment business as well – he might have lied but he did know what he was doing) and hefs forceful and convincing when he speaks and writes. He has a solid ability to get his point across, and would certainly shake things up a bit on the court – even with the justices he himself appointed.
Of course it will never happen. Bubba likes the limelight far too much and Obama I would bet knows more qualified candidates personally then the previous 8 Presidents combined – he was a Professor of Constitutional law himself, after all. And then there is this problem.
But still – wouldnft it be just hilarious?
Cheap shots:
Gotta love how Obama made the official announcement, and how his Press Secretary handled what could have been a very awkward moment.
May day! May day!
Life is suffering, he he hah hah. (50 points if you understand the reference)
Director/actor Kevin Smithfs new slasher flick sees to be about the direction the Republicantfs are going.
6 years. The Victory Party has gone on longer than the war itself.
Um, what? Apparently collections agencies are starting to model themselves after Glenn Closefs character in Fatal Attraction.
And because I love you, Toad the Wet Sprocket.
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4/28/09 – Topics for discussion
Ifm back! Did you miss me? I had a great vacation, although when we got back we discovered that our freezer had died. We gave a considerable amount of ice cream a burial at sea.
What should we talk about, Miss Ravenwood? My good friend Jeanettefs influence in getting Arlen Specter to become a Democrat (she moved there – that did it)? Torture? Impeaching a judge? The economy? Nixon shaking hands with Chairman Mao? The fact that wefre at day 99 and President Obama still has a day to completely screw it all up? Senator Franken still not being seated? Tracheotomy kits for waterboarding? Reagan sending men to jail for waterboarding? Swine Flu (koo koo ka chu – and geseundheit)? Cheney being even more of a douchebag than we thought? The gmoranh who spelled dissent gdescenth on his teabagger protest sign? Obamafs new science initiative? The race that the Republicans lost in New York? The absolutely insanely stupid election coming up in California? That Toto singer Bobby Kimball has formed a new band featuring musicians from Yes? Paul McCartneyfs $60K fine for playing a set too long at Coachella? Michelle Malkinfs hissy fit over the Bush-ordered government report that criticized people who think like Timothy McVeigh for thinking it was talking about her (okay, bad example)?
Itfs been an interesting couple of weeks, hasnft it? Have you been missing my snarky take on it all?
How about this then – people walked out on a lecture by Bill Nye the Science Guy because he had the unmitigated gall to point out that the light we see from the moon is reflected light. Because this contradicts the bible.
Say it with me people, what the fuck is wrong with you?
Bill Nye is about as harmless a personality as you could possibly imagine. Hefs an educator, a scientist, and childrenfs performerc hefs Raffi with a microscope or Fred Rodgers without those creepy puppets. He pointed out in his lecture that the bible is actually scientifically wrong on this point – that the bible says that the moon is the lesser of the two great lights (Ifm paraphrasing) and stating that the science of the time simply didnft know better, and that now we do. People walked out on from the lecture because it was seen as irreverent towards the teachings of the bible.
Um, people, you went to a science lecture. Youfre upset that you got some science? Youfre upset that the people who wrote down the words in the bible didnft yet have the scientific wherewithal to understand reflected light from an object in space? I just spent a week at Disneyland and I knew going in that at some point Ifd have to spend an hour in line so that my daughter could take a photograph with Mickey Mouse. Thatfs just how it is. So why on earth or the moon should this be upsetting to you?
Ah, location, location, location. The lecture was in Waco, Texas. You know Texas, donft you? The land of secession and we donft need no stinkinf government handouts (except for flu shots – please send about 500,000 of those). Where they love the United States so much that they just might have to leave the United States? Boy, do the Republicans need Senator Vinick. Oh wait, they had him – and he left.
Cheap Shots:
This makes me wonder if hefs going to try out for Geico commercials. (I always feel likec somebodyfs watching mec)
Senator Specterfs (D-PA) own statement. Rovefs reply. And some well-deserved snark.
Kinda dumb.
100 (99) day slideshow.
And because I love you, Toto.
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Yeah, Ifve been absent for a bit now, and I will be again after today. Next week is a well-earned vacation. This past week or so? Recovering from an injury and doing some activism. Allow me to explain.
The injury first – Glen Beck and his ilk (the gDick Armyh for lack of a better term) are responsible. Itfs this whole gTeabaggingh thing theyfre doing today. Being a bit more current in my sex slang than apparently the entire nutsack wing of the Republicant Party – or at least those persons unstable enough to base an entire lifestyle philosophy off of a 50 year-old work of fiction - I laughed so hard that I suffered an injury. Donft worry, my teabags are fine, thank you. But after seeing Rachel Maddow, Keith Olbermann, and David Schuster all nearly kill themselves trying not to laugh on television while they ran the obvious double-entendres into the ground, I decided that it would be time to create an appropriate counter-protest, which I have spent the past few days organizing.
My wife discovered that one of these Teabaggeries (Teabuggeries?) was going to take place here in San Francisco. So I went into the Castro looking for men brave enough to be willing to show their own teabags in counter-protest. Many were willing. Less when they realized it wasnft a cute pick-up line. I have no idea how many men will do this – by the time this gets posted it will all be over and Ifm not doing it myself (I wont go anywhere near these people with my temper – it would be bad) so it wonft surprise me if no one does it – but this is San Francisco.
I tried to put together a website to drum up support, but nearly everything with the word gTeabagh has been taken by the Dick Army. So instead I registered http://showoffyour.junk.net but as of this writing it isnft up and running, perhaps having been teabagged itself. The site may not be safe for work.
Okay seriously, since when has a grass-roots movement ever started from the top? Who are you fucking trying to kid? Ya aintf foolinf nobody with your teabags. Protesting that the taxes of most of us are going down? I got news for you – Ifm solidly middle-class. My taxes went up for the past 8 years. They were lower in the Clinton years and from what Ifve read of the tax bills they will be lower again next year. Herefs something to think about – the taxes changes other than a few bucks on most peoplefs weekly paychecks havenft happened yet. Compare 2009 to 2008 and then see if you actually have something to protest about.
Unless you make more than $250K per year (I donft). If you do, maybe you can show us your teabags.
Update as of 10:45am PST: Hundreds have shown up. Hundreds. Please. Thousands show up here for a Janitorfs Strike. Reality has not only lapped satire itfs licking its teabags. Hundreds of Thousands show up for real protests. None of my people have shown and I donft blame them. Itfs cold here today and people generally tend to like their tea strong.
Update as of 12:00pm PST: Ohhh, ouch. The police broke up the Washington DC Teabuggery because they didnft get their protest permits. You know, the kinds that the Bush Administration said everyone had to have to engage in protests? Oh, and some idiot threw something over the fence at the White House (possibly their own teabags) bringing out the Secret Service. Smart.
Update as of 2:00pm PST: Exsqueeze me? The definition of Fascism is Government and Business colluding together? Doesnft that mean wefre just now getting out from under Fascism? Oh and Cody, speaking as a man with long hair, the look doesnft work for you.
Update as of 2:20pm PST: Ya know, using the imagery of greloadingh and pictures of guns to make your point in front of the very building where Harvey Milk was assassinated by a right-wing nutcase doesnft make you a very sympathetic figure in my book.
Update as of 5:00pm PST: Not a big turnout. Some kids protested the protesters and a fist fight broke out, but none of my own teabaggers showed up. So I failed. Just not as spectacularly as they did. I expected nothing and got just that. On the flip side, the last anti-war protest here in San Francisco drew 200,000 people (a minor turnout) or about 27% of the population. This protest drew about 500, or about 0.067%. a 400-fold difference. Suck on those teabags.
Cheap Shots:
Hey Rush, you Motherfucker, Bush ordered the murders of hundreds of thousands of brown Muslims. Somebody shoot this fuck. In the knees. And then when he tries to get up, shoot him again. In the same place.
Therefs a storm a-brewinf.
Conservatives, itfs a valid question – when you think of Timothy McVeigh do you think of yourselves?
I think these people have to stop calling themselves the Party of Lincoln.
Then therefs Ron Paulfs specific brand of weirdness.
And because I love you we hilariously pervert some Billy Joel (I almost never embed video but I couldnft resist this one):
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3/31/09 – Willie and the Poorboysc
When I was young we were fairly poor. Not that I was aware of it, but if it wasnft for our virtually nonexistent mortgage we would have been in deep shit. But one thing we had was my momfs record collection, and one of my favorite albums was gWillie and the Poorboysh. Better known as Creedence Clearwater Revival – despite the fact that on the original issue you cannot find that name anywhere on it - this album was a lot of fun for me.
Ifve been thinking about that album a lot lately as the mortgage crisis starts to move into phase two. Banks are discovering that they canft afford to keep the properties theyfve been foreclosing, or they canft find buyers. Hell, therefs enough vacant property in Detroit alone to build San Francisco. Mendicito CA has an unemployment rate of 41%. This is going to get much worse, and herefs how:
What wefre finding starting to happen is that the banks who cannot afford these bad assets are abandoning them. For example, they foreclose on a house and evict the tenants/owners. Months go buy as the foreclosure process continues and the property falls into disrepair. Then, at the end of the process the back fails to take possession of the property. It reverts back to the mortgage holder, who is now responsible for the property again. It may have been vandalized. There may have been squatters. The mortgage still exists, quite likely unchanged.
Sound farfetched? You should really read this. Itfs already started.
Wefve been giving bloody tons of money to banks to reassume bad mortgages. Why is this a surprise? The mortgages arenft changed – only the banks have more money. The banks having money isnft the issue (okay, it is, but itfs an effect – not a cause). The problem is the mortgages in the first place. Giving the banks money doesnft solve this. Ifve been seeing story after story on the news about people attempting to renegotiate their mortgages into the affordable realm, but I have yet to see a single story where someone succeeds. Itfs not working.
The banks have no real incentive to renegotiate the mortgages. Not when we keep giving them money. The problem is that everyone seems to be buying into the line that the banks are too big to fail. If theyfre that big, then they should be broken into smaller pieces – itfs what we have anti-trust laws for. When the laws where changed in the Reagan Error to allow banks to do more than just be banks and allow insurers to be banks and stock brokers to be insurers and so on, that was the moment this started heading for the sewer. Itfs been more than 25 years – you canft put that genie back in the bottle. There is only one solution left and itfs the one that makes Glen Beck cry like a baby.
Nationalize the banks. If we want to actually help the people who have been screwed by all of this, itfs the only way. You canft make it mandatory for a bank to not try to make money – many of them are publicly held and as such are required to make the most money possible. Maybe that should be changed too. But the point is as long as such an atmosphere exists and banks are business and not a trust then this isnft going to stop.
Cheap Shots:
Keep in mind he did this several hours before the polls closed. What a dipshit.
Herefs yet another example of why you should keep a copy of everything youfve ever said with a lawyer in the room.
The rain in Spain falls mainly on Douglas Feith.
Ifm not really a fan of Joe Scarborough, but I have to admit, this is the most appropriate response to Glen Beck Ifve yet seen.
My only comment on this is; why are we waiting a week?
Supreme Court to Phillip Morris; STFU.
So what happens to Ebert & Roper now?
Some people use religion as a crutch. This Congressman uses it as a plastic bag to seal his head in before he goes to sleep.
Angel. No, Lorne.
Herefs why we need to expand Pell Grants dramatically.
No, Ifm afraid this isnft the home of Arthur gTwo Shedsh Jackson.
Wellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll allrighty then.
World War I was started with the assassination of Arch-Duke Ferdinand. World War II by German invading Poland. World War III – by giving a comedian a job.
What a novel way of getting someone to confess to murder.
In case you donft remember, hefs actually one hell of a banjo player.
Is CNBC disintegrating?
And because I love you, San Francisco legends Romeo Void.
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Lot of people have gone after Chuck Todd and the other people of the press who kept on President Obama last night about how he hasnft asked people to make sacrifices. As has been said pretty much everywhere, we elected Obama to put a stop to the sacrifices that wefve already made. Thatfs us, not people like Chuck Todd (although his taxes are going to go up and thatfs a sacrifice – Ifm sure he makes much more than $250K per year).
But what I notice is that Obama did what he does best, give clear answers and not hide them in political speak-ease. Hefs quite good at it and a sizeable majority of the American Public appreciate that. His answer last night pointing out that he likes to know what hefs talking about before he speaks was a marvelous put-down of the entire previous administrationfs public face. And despite a number of attempts to get Obama off message, he managed to get back to it every time, including when asked about border patrols with Mexico and the situation in Israel. I love that he went out of his way to call on the reporter from Stars and Stripes (and just how does that reporter serve in the military with that haircut?) and dug deep into the issues that affect veterans.
So whatfs the big story this morning from those newspapers that get the big news? That not a single one of them were called upon. The press conference went an hour and he answered I believe 12 questions total, going into a level of detail that probably has former President Drunken Chimp reaching for his gmedicineh bottle. Please people, you all have stories you can write, things you can investigate. You will get your turn – Obama has gone out of his way to be inclusive so donft cry that you donft get as much time with him as you used to. It will come around.
There was once a great cartoonist named Doug Marlette (sadly, no longer with us) who once wrote of the press, gItfs not the Ordinary Press that gets you, itfs the Full Court Pressh. Obama took an hour from his day (and probably much more in preparation) to do this. Let the man go back to work. Thatfs where we need him.
Cheap Shots:
And his counter-speech, Governor Jindal proved that he can be even more of a tool than he was last time.
An inside look at a smack-down from the smack-ee.
And again from the inside of AIG, the man does have a point. Although, if the company had gone under, he wouldnft have gotten the bonus anyway.
I donft remember Richard Pryor having a TV series, but he obviously did – and herefs his own version of the 1st Black President. (Notice Tim Reed of WKRP in Cincinnati playing the reporter from Ebony and an actress who was later part of the featured cast in Night Court as the reporter from Jet). I absolutely love the gibberish answers to the first two questions.
At this point I just hope he gets seated before he has to run for re-election.
gCo-responsibility.h Thatfs a word Condi would never have said.
Somebody please go ask Chuck what a fart weighs.
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightccccccc
I guess we get to keep the words gMountain Mamah in the song.
The decline of junk mail is leading to a shrinkage in government.
Go big or go home. Thatfs the phrase wefve been looking for.
And because I love you, Phish.
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You know, Ifve been sifting through things today and I find therefs nothing I really want to write about. Over the past week or two some of the media has actually been doing their jobs, and that makes me happy. Besides, my personal life is kinda busy right now. Maybe Ifll just go see Watchmen again. Although maybe I will watch Jindal give the response to Obamafs speech tonight again. That should be an interesting train wreck.
But because I love you, I present the amazing Theresa Andersson
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3/20/09 – Gin and Tonic Fridayc
Cheap Shots to end your week with:
Obamafs going to get his butt kicked if he accepts, and deservedly so.
And the Subpoenas fly.
We donft want your guns. Keep them at home.
Somebody call Tippi Hedren.
Apparently the Des Moines Register is Socialist. Cool.
Although he did gain another set of trophy testicles.
Senator, you was a moron, but at least knew it you did.
Maybe he needs to monitor a volcano after all.
Yep, he won.
Ahem, Tim Neal, now you know what it feels like to be black.
Should have given him a region-free player too.
Thank you, and Eid-eh Shoma Mobarak.
And Because I love you, New Order performing Joy Division
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With Ellen Tauscher now going to the State Department does anyone even remember that she was the first member of Congress in the Green Party.
Okay... shhhhc now that wefve thoroughly distracted the talking heads and the village idiots I need to talk to you all about the secret left-wing list that got leaked from Politico. You know the one, that Markos and Olbermann and a bunch of others have been merrily denying that they belong to. Yeah, that one. Well, Ifve never been all that comfortable with the secrecy part of all this, so Ifm coming out.
I am a part of this list. Ifm proud to be. If a freakinf liberal and proud of it, so when I was offered the chance to join Ezra Klein, Tedd Rall, Tom Tomorrow and a few listed at Hullaballoo whom I respect in helping advance the agenda I jumped at the chance. So here are a few of the things we plan to do now that we have a friendly voice in the White House (although Tedd still bitches):
Nationalize the banks. Nyeah.
Socialized Medicine.
Maneuver Rush Limbaugh into the lead of the Republicanft Party.
Make certain that every picture of Mitch McConnell run in a national news story makes him look like a turtle.
Break up that Pesky Palin Couple (thatfs an extra notch in the belt there!)
Take away your guns.
Yes, YOUR guns.
Gay Marriage. Gay Polygimal Marriage Damnit!
Put together a hoard of television clips available at a momentfs notice for Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert. And Keith Olbermann.
Continue to tilt the internet to the left.
Invent Twitter to show Republicantfs taking up the latest trend while we sit back and laugh at the headline potential of twitters and twits.
Teach abortion rights in your schools.
Yes, YOUR schools.
Open full relations with Cuba – hey some of us do smoke you know (although I donft).
Stem Cell research to farm the potential of cloning.
Work on the first public appearance of The Rock Obama. (Yes, get Angry Mr. President!)
Convince the best shots that the Republicantfs have for the White House in 2012 that they shouldnft take money that would help people living in their states – especially when theyfre not getting it any other way.
Induct Yes into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Rush too.
Make The Dixie Chicks mandatory music in every country radio station in the nation.
Appoint Richard Gere Ambassador to China.
Force you to join a Union.
Give Michael Moore a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
Formally recognize the Independent State of Palestine.
Make Bill OfReilly even more ridiculous by making available for free his audio book for gThose Who Trespassh
Tax bonuses of companies wefve bailed out at an astonishing rate.
Redistribute the wealth – some of it to ourselves of course. Itfs our turn damn it!
Make Glenn Beck cry.
Convince Michelle Malkin to pose with a swastika.
Destroy the book sales of Ann Coulter, while increasing those of Catherine Coulter. Bwa. Ha. Ha.
Have the top movie in the nation feature a great big blue flaccid penis.
Think about how many of these wefve already accomplished, and cower in fear you Marx Haters! Now those of you already on the list say the secret word and get $50.
And because I love you, Anderson, Bruford, Wakeman and Howe. And (bonus!) because of the birthday, Bruce Springsteen.
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Only my family will get that one.
Where to begin, where to begin? Therefs been so much unbethinkingbelievable bullshit come out in the last few days that you need a scorecard to keep track of the scorecards. AIG and their bonuses, Glen Beck not being able to prove something doesnft exist, the ghow dare you insult Dick Cheneyh crowd, the Chairman of the Fed actually giving an interview, some economic expert claiming we have to fight inflation (um, dude, the current problem is exactly the opposite), the continuing saga of Michael Steelec
But how about this instead? Apparently, instead of having an actual plan to present (which I would mock mercilessly) or presenting ideas it appears that the Republican members of congress are sending their staffs out to pretend that theyfre producers for Bill ORLY. Without identifying themselves as congressional staffers, the people posing as ordinary citizens ask questions designed to get a rise out of the Democrat being questioned, and if one of them says something that seems like a gaffe, YouTube here we come!
Trying to make Macaca out of a Molehill.
Look, the citizens of this country should and do have the right to question their representatives. I have no problem with that. What I have a problem with is trying to turn a reasoned debate into Aericafs Funniest Congressional Videos. Itfs a classless move, and if we were doing it the Republicants they would scream bloody murder, and rightfully so. Taping a publicly given speech (such as the Macaca moment a while back) is fair game as far as Ifm concerned, but just hassling someone for the purpose of embarrassing them puts you at the level of Alan Funt, minus the self-respect.
Can you jackasses please even make an attempt to do some work? We pay you quite a bit of money to do so – not to try to get $10K from Alan Thicke. Put the fucking camera down and help us!
Cheap Shots:
Oh, my ears! Pass the ear-bleach! Ow ow ow!
We might have forgotten about it, but he really was innocent.
Seppuku? Not quite.
Dr. Who says, gBrilliant!h I agree – this is pretty amazing.
Sorry, John, but if someone insults my daughter like this woman insulted yours, that person will receive a pounding unlike anything they have ever experienced.
Is the abbreviation of Twitter Twit?
And because I love you, Stone Roses. Itfs at about the 4 minute mark that things get interesting.
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3/13/09 – Thinking about thinkingc
Yes, I have now seen the Stewart vs. Cramer live thanks to a torrent so I didnft use the pay-per-view. Cramer got smacked around and rightly so, and Cramer, to his credit, pointed out that hefs not a journalist – but that people who are should have done better, and so should have his network. If he follows through with the promises he made to Stewart, then the upcoming weeks over at CNBC should be interesting as all hell.
But itfs gotten me to thinking about a trend in bolviating that seems to be used primarily on the conservative side of the spectrum – speaking from the hip. Watching Michael Steele and everyone else kowtow to a radio performer and apologize for saying what they think, Ann Coulter blaming people like me for her declining book sales (despite the fact that I have never read her piece-of-shit books) instead of the fact that she has far fewer newspaper readers than she once did, Glen Beck blaming people like me for causing the church shooting in Alabama – despite the fact that Ifve never been, Mitch McConnel (R-KY Jelly) saying that Obamafs Presidency is a failure despite the fact that wefve only seen 1.7% of it, the various flip-flops by former Senator Norm Coleman in his fight to keep Al Franken from taking his seat in the U.S. Senatec
You get the idea.
The talking point seems to be we were right, and even after wefve been proven wrong we were still right and I donft give a damn what your DNA tests tell you. I suppose that makes a sort of sense given that this is the party that tried to subjugate science for the past 8 years. Truth matters not, only that you must be brow-beaten into accepting our point of view. Theyfre not even trying to get the DNA evidence thrown out – theyfre saying we should ignore it and everything that supports it. And itfs this more than anything that is dividing the nation into two distinct groups; those who believe the evidence, and those who believe their hearts.
Ifm not talking about religion – this isnft about faith. This is about accepting reality and working within it, something Barack Obama has done masterfully, even when I donft agree with him (which has happened more than once already). This is about knowing that previous economic policies didnft work. This is about accepting responsibility. This is about not passing on the blame. This is about not acting like a 5 year-old.
For the most part, the conservative talking heads out there are sticking to the idea that their ideas will work damnit if done properly! How much more properly does it need to be? Theyfve had 3 presidents in over 20 years do it their way, and it didnft work. We had 1 president over 8 years do it kinda-sorta our way and it worked one hell of a lot better.
I understand how hard it is to admit you were wrong – and that itfs in our nature as Americans to always be right. But can we act as humans instead? As in gTo Err is Human?h Wefre going to fuck up from time to time, and you fucked up. We all know it. And the thing is, itfs now been exposed publicly, which is humiliating. I understand that – no one save for a reality show contestant enjoys public humiliation. But please, youfre compounding the error.
If nothing else, you may just be proof that our education system needs an overhaul – it produced you.
Cheap Shots (get your Gin and Tonic shots ready!):
There are Pro-Union Republicans. Honestly! Herefs an op-ed written by one thatfs marvelous.
Glen Beck has us surrounded! Be sure to hunt down the hourly updates.
Some of the Fark submissions were funnier.
Look, I gotta ask, do you have to move every few years?
Madness! Madness!
No more Enemy Combatants!
Joe, dude, Swimming pools mean places for the kids to go play in the summer, and a decrease in gangs. Spend the fucking money.
And because I love you, Todd Rundgren. And as a plus, a recent performance of his first hit from 40 (gasp!) years ago. And on this clip it looks like his bass player Kasim Sultan breaks his ankle, but he plays right through.
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If youfre like me, and by this I mean with a dark sense of humor, you have been enjoying the ongoing gconversationh between Jim Cramer of CNBC and Jon Stewart of Comedy Central. They have torn into each other repeatedly over the past few days and Stewart manages to come out on top each time. You would think that Cramer would learn his lessonc
cbut her never does, which can be evidenced by the repeated mistakes he makes with his stock forecasts on CNBC. The guy is a wackjob, and may have done illegal things back when he was a trader himself. Yeah, this is the guy you want to trust.
But herefs the thing. Cramer is going on Stewartfs show this coming Thursday. Thatfs March 12th, 2008. So youfve gotta ask youself, in a deep thought kind of moment, what kind of a publicity whore is Jim Cramer?
Cheap Shots:
Yet another reason we all miss Bruce Lee.
As a kid I can remember people still living in Depression-era tin shacks where I grew up – yes, in the 1970s. I wonder if vinyl is any warmer?
Are you freakinf kidding me? No insurance premiums collected for 10 years? Is it any fucking wonder that we need to nationalize the banks?
If Sean Hannity sit in on your bible class, stone his ass.
A segregationist is trying to oust the head of the RNC.
It turns out I didnft want that money for a new house, so Ifm giving it back. Eventually. By the way, like my new house?
Why do we even argue about earmarks? The way I see it, earmarks are the time when Senators get to do something specific for their own districts. Besides, itfs $8 Billion out of $410 Billion. Just under 2%. Whatfs in the remaining 98% that theyfre not complaining about?
Uh-huh, sure. And your wife forgave you fully for hanging out with hookers too.
A list of underrated musicians I cannot disagree with.
And because I love you, Flaming Lips performing Madonna in a way you may have never imagined.
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Ya know, I have to wonder if Rush Limbaugh has a trophy case (I just added that hyperlink – Ifm not the only person to have thought of this) for all of the testicles of Republicant leaders hefs collected over the past few months. Time after time, a politician has called Limbaughfs brand of rhetoric anything from gunamusingh to ginsultingh, and in each case the person who said it apologized for having a different opinion than him within 48 hours. I would imagine that the testicle trophy case is getting a bit crowded.
For years now the Republicants have been legendary in their unity. It was awe-inspiring at times to watch them all hold to the exact same principles and attempt to govern from them. We Democrats didnft have that – wefre a diverse bunch and some of our disagreements on policy issues have been legendary. But therefs a problem with their approach as compared to ours. Eventually, the single-mindedness of the approach wears on people – it starts to come across as first bullying, then uneducated. Thatfs where they are now, and itfs going to kill them.
What the Republicants have failed to realize (or if they have theyfre too afraid to admit it) is that our diversity is a strength. Face it, Rush Limbaugh isnft a diversity-embracing kind of guy, whereas we are. Itfs a harder road to take, and a longer path to success, but the successes tend to be more deep-rooted and longer lasting. Social Security. Medicaid. These were Democratic programs. The only Republican program that I can come up with that has had similar impact is the EPA (which yes, was put together by Nixon in perhaps his most liberal moment) and that is also a celebration of diversity.
Diversity overcomes every time. Although it often takes a long time.
Cheap Shots:
gAbsent ability to pay claims, therefs no business there at all. Itfs just fraud.h
Herefs a worthy review of gJoeh the gPlumberfsh book.
Even the New York Times (which has no comics section) thinks itfs Time to Nationalize.
Personally, Ifll take the day off.
Fortune Cookie Rush. The Canadian (i.e. better) Rush.
Oklahoma? Okay!
How does one say gWhat a dickh in Spanish?
With income levels as high as these guys make, can not one of them afford an accountant to explain how taxes work?
Until I hear what kind of beer it was, Ifm holding onto my outrage.
Fair and balanced. Yup. Fair and Balanced.
Even my 9 year-old daughter understands gNo backsies.h Why donft they?
Glen, you really need to be careful with the Slavery remarksc
And because I love you, The Flaming Lips performing the Oklahoma state song.
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I will always give Republicans credit for one thing they have been doing well for years – staying on message. Ifve never much agreed with the message, but theyfve been very good for the last 30 years not wavering from whatever it is theyfre pushing. And if they change their view on an issue – they go all out swinging for the fences, much like Simple Jack.
We Democrats have had problems with that. Not me personally – Ifve always been a commie homo-loving bastard (thank you Sean Penn) – but the party in general hasnft been well-focused in recent years. A few people have noticed that and have pointed it out, but no one in a position of power has done much about it save for one person; and hefs our President.
Ifve noticed lately that Obama has a strong grasp of the ability to remain on message. That message is three simple things; economy, education, health care. He spent almost all of his speech the other day talking about those three things. He spent all of one sentence on Social Security and even those Presidents before him who didnft want anything to do with the issue spent more time on it. Everything else he delegates. Sure, hefs made some strong stances on the wars and on Guantanamo, as well as other things, but once hefs done with that he moves back to the big three.
There are a lot of people who have their own core issues in the Democratic Party. Torture. Punishing the Drunken Chimp. Free trade. Immigration. They push and they push on these issues and I admit Ifm no different. Some of these people feel left out because Obama hasnft moved on their core issues yet, despite campaign promises to do so. They are dismayed when Obama waffles on the idea of prosecuting the criminals of the previous administration. I donft see it that way. I want it to happen, but Ifm not worried. Itfs the job of his administration to handle this, and thatfs an awful lot of people. Obama just doesnft want to be shaken from his big three message. Come on folks, give the man his 100 days.
On the flip side, I notice that the Republican Party is still staying on message too – pity itfs the wrong message and itfs so astonishingly bad. They talk as if smaller government worked. They talked as if lower taxes for the wealthy worked. They talk as if lower regulations worked. Smaller government? Ask the people of New Orleans how that worked for them. Lower taxes? Check out the size of our deficit. Lower regulations? Ask the families of those who died from eating peanut butter, spinach, or playing with toys shaped like Pixar characters. These are the messages put forth by Michael Steele and Bobby Jindal, and wefre tired of them now. The gGreed is Goodh era has abated somewhat for now (donft worry, it will be back) and theyfre still playing to it.
Cheap Shots:
I said I wasnft worried about Obamafs priorities. Read why yourself.
You know what I got from this piece of news? The fact that if someone who makes 10 times as much as I do takes the same deductions, he gets more money back than I do. Okay, Ifm on board with this whole Socialism thing now.
Eventually they will make a movie about this. Who will play Al Franken?
Remember the young lady that Obama singled out about the letter she wrote about her school, which is falling apart? The current chairman of the Fed attended the same school.
Colorado and teh stupid.
Conversely, this is freakinf brilliant.
Ah, refreshing!
Will trade one Black Democrat for one Mormon Republican.
Getcher last kicks in!
Beware this stupid fucking piece of shit.
So long to Life in Hell. I knew about Matt Groening long before you did. Nyeah.
I hadnft made this connection until it popped up last night, but it is uncanny.
Sometimes nature is simply awesome.
And because I love you, Johnny Cash.
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Thatfs what my grandma used to call what both President Obama and Governor Jindal did last night. The big difference is that Obama gave a rouser, while Jindal fell flat on his face with a speech so tone deaf that it could have come from Newt Gingrich circa 1994, with some Liizzianna spice thrown in. You knew it was going to be bad for Jindal from his overly theatrical entrance on. Even Keith Olberman (who apparently forgot to turn his mike off) said gOh Godh under his breath. When it was over Rachael Maddow was so underwhelmed that she couldnft even form a coherent sentence. David Brooks, perhaps the dumbest person in America on the public stage, actually got one right and called it a disaster. My son called it gEpic Failh.
Jindal used folksy ways and speechifyinf to talk about how the Republican way is the right way. He ridiculed things like a gMagnetic train from Disneyland to Vegash and gVolcano Monitoring.h Dude, do you have any idea how many commuters fly from Orange County to Vegas (or in the other direction) on a daily basis? Oh, and by the by, Maglev technology means Bullet Trains – something we are far lacking in this country. And I gotta ask, who wouldnft want our volcanoes monitored? We have a number of live ones in the continental U.S., and entire State created by others, and in the last 30 years eruptions have killed over 100 people and caused damage in the billions of dollars. Seems worth studying to me.
He talked about how they tried to do things during Katrina. Given just how bad a failure Katrina was, he deserved a kick in the teeth for that one. Over and over he used an example about how boats werenft allowed out, when the person we was talking about didnft know about it himself until a week after. Oh, and that sheriff he was talking about? Hefs the guy who said that racial profiling was good police work and hefs also the guy shut down the bridges heading out of town – that sure played well. As for Jindal, you can make your own call about his judgment abilities, but keep in mind that this is a man who accepted the portions of the stimulus package that had to do with roads, and turned down those parts that would have help the unemployed. I guess therefs not an unemployment problem in Liizziana – and so soon after Katrina too!
Meanwhile, Obamafs speech was a home run. He outlined major talking points, then followed each up with specifics. He told where the new taxes would hit – by raising the taxes of those who make over $250K back to the levels they were at in the Clinton years. Hey rich people, you did fairly well during those years if memory serves. He told how quickly he wants action on health care – and that he wants a bill written by Orin Hatch passed ASAP. He talked about the oversight board that Vice President Biden will be running. He talked about education. He talked about volunteerism. He got down and specific on so many things.
My grandma would have liked this guyfs speechifyinf.
Cheap Shots:
Senator Byrd, seriously?
This is Bobby Jindalfs Nfawleanz?
And because the previous post talks about it and I didnft know, take a look at Six Flags New Orleans today.
Madlib the Republican response to the stimulus package!
Way to show backbone there Nancy! Finally!
By the way, ever hear about how Jindal exorcised a demon, cured cancer, and believes that the Bible is science?
Clarence Thomas is still treating women with respect, I see.
And because I love you, Tinted Windows.
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For those of you keeping score, I got all of 4 correct on my Oscar Predictions. I am obviously not in the movie biz.
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2/20/09 – If you donft actually know anything about a topic, shut the hell up!
Grover Norquist is 7 different kinds of asshole. He presents himself as an expert on all things taxes and yet is so astoundingly stupid that it really made me mad this morning. Allow me to explain.
In the weekday mornings I turn on the local Fox affiliate for news. Usually theyfre actually all right – they donft do the morning feed from their network (i.e. Fox gNewsh) and are fairly well attuned to the concerns of the San Francisco Bay Area. Besides, their morning people are so obnoxious that itfs impossible to go back to sleep – which is key for me. This morning one of their talking heads was interviewing Grover Norquist about the new budget that just got passed in our state, after months of wrangling.
Now, these days Norquist is passing himself off as an advocate of gNo Taxesh. He went into this lengthy soliloquy about how Nevada, Oregon and Florida donft have state taxes. He went on and on about how California should be cutting services to balance its budget. He went on and on, and all the while I couldnft help noticing that the backdrop to him speaking was the capital building. The one in Washington D.C.
Hey Grover, do you live in California? No? Well I do and have most of my life. You have no clue what the California experience is, so shut the fuck up!
But allow me to debunk his comparing of Californiafs tax system to the system of these other states, which comes across like comparing Apples to Koalas. Nevada has gambling. Lots of it – you may have noticed. Oregon has other revenue streams, like mandatory full service gasoline stations. Florida has a very large retired population, but it also has a few of the worldfs largest theme parks. All of these things are huge revenue systems and cover a large portion of what each state requires.
What does California have? A lifestyle far different and in my opinion far superior to those other states (you are welcome to disagree about that one). The thing is, what we Californians expect from living here is much more than what you have in these other states. Those things arenft free, and thus the taxes. No one likes taxes really, but if we want California to be at the very least different from those other places Norquist mentioned, we absolutely need these things. It is part of what defines us. Itfs like asking the French to give up wine or the British to give up bad roast beef.
What Norquist is implying is that he wants California to be the same as all of those other places. No thank you.
I donft like taxes much, but this whole bullshit reasoning that taxes are bad has got to stop. Paying taxes is Patriotism. Most of us will never serve in the military. Most of us will never have a government job. So how do we contribute to making our government and our nation the best it can be? For most of us, itfs taxes, and Californiafs taxes have been too low for nearly 30 years, thanks to a piece of near-sighted lawmaking known to the world as Proposition 13. Yes, peoplefs taxes went down. Yes, property taxes got capped. But guess what, my high school AP program got cancelled. The local library closed. The voters of California saved themselves some money but they fucked every 14 year-old in the state up the ass, and it never improved after that. I recently visited my old town and itfs far more depressing than I remember it. You want a description? Read the 2nd half of gThe Grapes of Wrathh.
Oh, and let me note that one of the three Republicans who voted for the new budget represents that same town.
Rum and Coke Cheap Shots (this week featuring Captain Morgan, because you havenft been putting enough sugar in your rum):
I donft understand why everyone is so scared of nationalizing the banking system. It seems to me that with all of the failures lately that nationalizing the banking system will actually save the stock market and the investors. After all, itfs the banking stocks thatfs dragging everything down.
Speaking of which, this is just speculation, but hefs been right before.
Read this carefully. Homeowners will need to keep logs of WiFi access of their own routers, presentable to the government at any time. Fuck you, I ainft doing it.
Remember when Rush was a drug addict and only mildly insane? Cutting out the drugs has brought him to this.
I may adopt this business model myself!
Oh and Rush, Obama doesnft want the Fairness Doctrine to return. Thatfs just me.
I think I like Obamafs Press Secretary.
I donft know the answer to this, but did Midnight Oil ever have any songs about Whaling?
Ah, the irony.
It ainft mud wrestling but it is a fine thing to watch.
Calling Tom Joad, calling Tom Joad.
And, in honor of this knee-quaking post, I present the Doobie Brothers. And herefs my favorite Doobie Song.
In the military, donft they court-martial people for not following the orders of their commanders? What about commanders-in-chief?
This has been a shitty week for music fans. Add one more. Whenever you heard a lead vocal with harmonies, this was the man doing the harmonies.
Ooooh, subtle.
Freedom Fist! Start at the bottom and work your way up. Then see the inspiration.
This is not an apology. Sorry if you think it is.
Jefferson Davis, you got punked!
So who do I think is going to win at the Oscars? Best Picture – Slumdog Millionaire (although Ifd prefer Milk). Best Driector – Gus Van Sant – Milk. Best Actor – Sean Penn – Milk, although I admit I havenft seen Frost/Nixon or The Wrestler. Actress – no freakinf clie. Supporting Actor – Heath Ledger – The Dark Knight (duh). Supporting Actress – Taraji P. Henson – The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. Animated Feature – WALL-E (another duh). Foreign Film – Waltz With Bashir. Original Screenplay – Milk. Adapted Screenplay – Frost/Nixon. Documentary – Trouble The Water, although I admit I truly enjoyed Man on Wire. Original Score – Milk – this is Danny Elfmanfs triumph for soundtrack work – not awarding this oscar would be a crime). Original Song – Down to Earth from WALL-E – props to Peter Gabriel. Editing – Milk. After this I abstain from voting, except for gambling pools. Yes, I think Milk will have a big night.
And because I love you, The Steve Miller Band.
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2/18/09 – Liars and fucking liarsc
A lot is already being made about this cartoon. The newspaper claims it isnft racist, and is actually inspired by an incident where a womanfs pet chimpanzee attacked her and was shot by the police. Bullshit. Youfre lying and everyone know it. How? Read the freakinf words in the comic! A woman attacked by a chimp. A chimp shot by a chimp. Someone to write the stimulus package. If you can honestly say all three of these things are related then you need help. Psychiatric help.
I have said often in the past that failure to recognize racism is in and of itself, racism. This is not that. The pathetic explanation given here is so lame that David Duke is saying, gYoufre kidding, right?h
Youfre lying. Ifm calling you a fucking liar. Yeah, themfs fightinf words, So come out to play.
Ifve noticed the word gSocialisth getting thrown around a lot lately – often on the campaign and just as often now. I have a question for the Rush Limbaugh/Sean Hannity/Michelle Malkins of the world and their ilk. Do you think that all black people are Socialists?
For a woman of color herself, Ifm honestly amazed at Michelle Malkinfs actions sometimes. Yesterday she posed with a man holding a sign with a Swastika replacing the gOh in Obama. Perhaps she doesnft own a mirror. Perhaps shefs a vampire. It would certainly make sense.
Anyway, getting back to the topic – trying the gSocialisth label to Obama is racist. RACIST. This is a man of faith and a man with a strong capitalist background. Hefs not as rich as some of his fellow politicians but he isnft poor either. He and his wife have done all right for themselves, and they are seeing to it that their children get a private education. That doesnft sound like socialism to me. It sounds a lot like you guys calling him that.
Would you be throwing around the gSocialisth label if Obama wasnft black? Are you lying?
Or would you rather that he were a chimp?
Cheap Shots:
Now this is lead-er-shit.
Ifd vote for this guy if I lived there.
Try to picture 14,000 square kilometers.
Oooh, I hadnft thought of it this way. Well Scooter?
The GOP has been punked by Aerosmith!
What are you supposed to say after you let rip a huge belch?
Oops. Nfawleans style.
And because I love you, Chuck Mangione, featuring Gerry Niewood on the song that inspired me to write my senior thesis for the Alto Flute. You are missed, Gerry.
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2/17/09 – What the fuck is wrong with you people?
Sometimes I actually get to say my own catch phrase, but Ifve never felt so entitled to do so. I cannot comprehend this. It makes no sense at all. You people must be out of your fucking minds to threaten this woman. A single mother, who wanted a couple of children and by accident of how it was done wound up with 14. And shefs doing so willingly, with love in her heart. Shefs a hero, and fuck you for thinking otherwise.
Look, Octuplets must be mind-blowing. Staggering. And with 6 other kids? I canft even imagine it. But to scream bloody murder because shefs on welfare and to give out death threats all the while singing gevery sperm is sacredh puts you in a rare category. That category is; gpeople who deserve to be punched in the mouth repeatedly.h
I will happily go to hell if that is someplace that you will not be.
Cheap Shots:
So, are you feeling stimulated yet?
Pat Robertson and I agree on something? Can someone call Satan and ask for a weather report? I donft have the number.
Can we start with some of the bozos close to the top?
Set phasers to rawr!
The main reason I respect Nancy Pelosi as Speaker of the House is because she said we should NEVER DO THIS.
And because I love you, Alan Holdsworth.
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Goodbye Gerry Niewood (woodwinds) and Coleman Mellett (guitar) – these two men were a sizeable chunk of the soundtrack of my childhood. They will be missed.
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2/12/09 – I had the most interesting morningc
I got ambushed by Bill ORLY this morning, as I was taking my daughter to school. This stunned me for many reasons – mostly because I always figured that my second run-in the paparazzi would have something to do with my music, not my blog. (My first run-in was because I dated an actress once. Once, when I was young and handsome and, er, thinner.) I donft carry a camera phone so the only documented proof that this even exists rests solely with ORLYfs people and the memories of myself and my daughter, but I will recount the experience as best I can.
My blog isnft a big one. It isnft well read – I figure my readership numbers in the tens of ones. Ifm a lefty crank who puts up arguments that arenft always well thought-out or even reasonable, and I love to tweak peoples sensibilities. I enjoy getting people as mad as they sometimes make me. I donft update it every day, I update it late in the day when I do, the site is ugly as sin and I make no pretense for it being anything other than shooting off my own mouth, with occasional links and cheap shots to people who do much more work than I do – with occasional musical interludes. There are many many people more deserving of attention for this – digby, many of the writers on kos (my own favorite being Bill in Portland Maine – who I admit I stole a gag from), tom tomorrow and his group, the gang at Crooks and Liars, Arianna Huffington, Keith Olbermann, Wil Wheaton – the list could get quite lengthy. These are people who use well-reasoned and well-researched positions to do what they do. Theyfre all better at it than me, have bigger followings, and you would think that if anyone would find themselves the target of a Fear Factor ambush it would be one of them, not a decidedly not-well-known musician doing well enough to live where he does who just posts what hefs thinking about that day. Donft worry that you havenft heard of me – Ifve long become used to it.
Oh, there is one thing I have that none of the others do – I use the word gfuckh in my website url.
I invented the website in the summer of 2007 as a way to get back into blogging and because my wife was encouraging me to find another outlet for my rage besides yelling at the television, especially in front of the kids. I had an early blog back in the late 1990s called gThe Daily Ranth that featured a graphic of the word granth spray-painted on an American Flag. But what got me into hot water was a post about the sheer stupidity of the people who donft believe in global warming. I got a lot of hate mail and threats, and my son got a death threat (he was 7 at the time) so I put it away – the family always comes first. The past few years though have mostly been about how the government has pissed me off and I wanted back in after blogging took off, but I didnft want a repeat of what had happened before. I created the title based on my own outrage about what happened the last time around and was frankly surprised that I got away with it. I decided not to include a reader comments section or a feedback section. I decided not to put up my email address. I decided not to post or even keep statistics about site visits. Ifm not impossible to find, but I wanted to weed out the people that decided it was okay to threaten children because I thought they were stupid.
And itfs worked. I donft get a lot of e-mail about my blog, and Ifm perfectly happy with that. I know my friends read it, including the Republican ones (my friends are often scathing with me – which is fine as I often deserve it) but beyond that I have no clue about readership and donft care. At least I didnft until this morning.
First of all, Ifm amazed that ORLY would send someone to the Suburbs of San Francisco where I live. I would imagine that he didnft even know that San Francisco even has suburbs after that hit piece he did a few weeks back. Second, Ifm amazed he found me. Ifm not impossible to find but it isnft easy – Ifm not in the phone book or any other directory for that matter that Ifm aware of because I went cellular years ago. I donft go by my first name – the only thing I have in common with Joe the Plumber. Ifm not rich – I work for a living. And yet, sometime between the time my wife went to work and I left the house they camped at the foot my apartment building.
Okay, first reaction to someone walking up to you and saying gIfm so-and-so (Ifve already forgotten his name) with Bill ORLYfs Fear Factorch is one of blank amazement. I donft watch Fox gNewsh and at first I thought he was talking about that show where you eat cows eyes and jump off of bridges. I donft remember the rest of what he said because the first gut reaction to hit me I actually said aloud, gHuh?h I actually said, gHuh?h
He repeated who he was and where he was from while my daughter (aged 9) is zipping up her jacket. The he said, gCan you explain to us the audacity you have in using the word efuckf in the title of your website?h
Okay, at this moment I was still fogged in, but the fatherhood gene kicked in at that moment because I remember saying, gwatch your language, there is a child present.h
gThat doesnft seem to bother you on the web.h
gWell, wefre not there right now, are we?h I then started walking up the street with my girl, as the bus stop is 3 blocks away and we were on a time-table. They followed. I did my best to ignore them, but one question and my response to it sticks in my mind, because I was able to think fast – unusual for me in the morning.
Producer/Reporter/Whatever: gWould you be willing to appear on the Fear Factor to defend your website?h
Me: gWhatever for? Of all the fake new programs out there yours is the one that isnft funny. Yours is justc sad.h I declined to answer everything else and about a block away from the bus stop the stopped following me. I suppose that would be because other people were also there – one of the true joys of public transit.
Once we got on the bus my daughter asked me what that was all about, to which I answered that I honestly do not know. I still donft. Ifm not going to call up and ask what the hell they thought they were doing – that would imply that I want further contact with them and I do not. They werenft there when I got back home, which implies to me that they got whatever it was they were after, or they just gave up. I donft know, and I donft care.
So why tell you? Simple – they came for me. Like fucking Nazis they came for me. Do you think theyfre not going to come for you?
Cheap Shots:
My favorite comment about the stimulus package? gTaxpayers to pay $300 more per year, then get $300 rebate.h Sorry, I donft have a link for it – it came from a political cartoon in a newspaper.
What a Dick. There simply isnft any other explanation – unless he has something hidden in his closet so big that he had to make this move. Does this mean hefs going to be a Senator again – which would mean hefs screwed several people?
For my part, I was reminded of the Bela Lugosi stand-in in Plan 9 from Outer Space.
Go ahead and go back to sleep, Molly Bee.
Interesting fact: Charles Darwin and Abraham Lincoln were born the same day. Even the site I discovered this on hasnft yet made the connection. Although tristero did.
And here I was looking forward to seeing the broken down floats – I live at the end of the race route. It can be hilarious to see those elaborate costumes after theyfve been run in for 12 Kilometers.
I wonder if this means that the TVA is doomed?
And because I love you, Anthrax with Public Enemy. And I would swear I saw Ice T in there at one point. Herefs what Public Enemy was like before Flavor Flav became a parody of himself. And this is Anthrax, back when they had hairc
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2/4/09 – Just what are we anyway?
Yesterday The Dick Cheney said something in an interview with Politico that struck me as fundamentally wrong – not just wrong in the usual sense in that every word he has ever said is wrong, but far beyond even that. What he said was that protecting the country is ga tough, mean, dirty, nasty businessch
Just what the fuck is wrong with this man? Is that how he sees our soldiers? The men and women of the Coast Guard? The INS? No wonder he sent so many people to their deaths – these arenft people, theyfre the necessary scum we use to protect ourselves. Theyfre all Jack Bauer with a mean streak.
Protecting the country is one of the highest callings that anyone here can commit to. It is service above personal safety and comfort, and it puts your country higher than life, liberty, and all that jazz. Itfs not for everyone, but itfs certainly not what The Dick Cheney thinks. It is not a tough, mean, dirty, nasty business – itfs one of honor. Ifve never been a soldier and never will be, but even I can see it. His gany and all means necessaryh dogma is one that robs the people who do this work of the honor it is supposed to represent, and he just doesnft care.
Men without honor are like that. We must be better.
Cheap Shots:
I agree – letfs build some pyramids.
A Three-fer. A no-brainer. Obama rocks.
As much as we might all like Paul Krugman, he isnft Superman. Little help, please?
Ted, we love ya, but shut up and play yer guitar.
I didnft see it, but was there a top 10 list?
Drill baby drill? Uh, nope. Hit cancel. 77 times.
Joe, we love ya, but oops.
Herefs the stat: In 1976, the richest 1% of Americans took home 9% of national income. In 2006, they took home 20%. The last time that happened, 1928. Ifm not saying wefre heading for a Great Depression, Ifm just sayinfc
And because I love you, Rush. And then Jacob Moon, doing Rush.
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1/28/09 – Getting the facts straight
The other night on the Daily Show former President Jimmy Carter did something remarkable – he took credit for opening relations with China, something everyone always credits Nixon for. After all, Nixon did go to China and say that there was gOne Chinah. What Carter pointed out was that Nixon never said which China was gthe oneh and continued things as they had been for years, having Taiwan be the primary trading partner. It wasnft until Carter that relations with mainland China opened up.
This morning I was watching the morning news when an economist was talking about how hefs disappointed at the lack of corporate tax cuts in the Obama stimulus plan. He went on to say that under Reagan in the early 80fs he cut corporate taxes and it worked, bringing the economy out of stagnation. The reporter didnft challenge him on the pronouncement and so it got passed of as fact. Which is horseshit. The economy got fucked in the early 80fs. But itfs been a long time now and the memories of people are fickle, so let me give you a quick primer.
What I remember about the early 1980fs and the mid 1980fs are the layoffs. I lived in Southern California in those days and I remember the numbers for just where I lived being 20 – 50,000 a week just for Los Angeles alone. Unemployment rose in such great numbers that the Reagan administration decided that if you hadnft found a job in 6 months then you werenft really looking for work and shouldnft be counted in the unemployment statistics. Because of that little slight-of-hand unemployment dropped from about 9% to about 5% almost overnight. This counting method is still being used today. Without that adjustment unemployment is over 11%. Thatfs right, more than one person in 10 is out of work right now. If you donft know someone personally who is unemployed youfre in the minority.
What else do I remember about the early to mid 1980fs? Ah yes, corporate greed. The poster boy was Marvin Gecko, the fictional character from the movie gWall Streeth who claimed that gGreed is goodh. The number one stock broker went to jail. The number one private business story of the decade went to jail. One of the top bankers went to jail. Banks collapsed. Junk bonds suddenly lived up to their name. Supposedly noble politicians, including John Glenn, Alan Cranston, and John McCain found themselves under ethical clouds.
Any of this seem familiar? Bush II wasnft Reagan lite, Reagan was Bush II lite. We have all of the problems of the 80fs and even more now, so why on earth would anyone want to do the things Reagan did? They were abject failures and should be abandoned.
So what is wrong with our collective memories that we still seem to think that the Reagan years were good ones? I donft know the answer, but it seems to me that many people make the mistake of forgetting the past and therefore repeat it. Sometime in the last 30 years it became standard practice to accept anything youfre told as the truth. The moniker we children of the 60fs used to use seems to have died.
Question Everything.
So why the fuck arenft we? Why arenft the reporters? Itfs their freaking job for crying quietly! This is a uniquely American problem – we donft interact with our government. Being a Republic tends to make that happen. We took that old Roman model and insulated it – none of us can just walk on the Senate floor and bring a motion.
Cheap Shots:
Yeah, thatfs bipartisanship we can believe in. And they followed through. By my way of thinking that means that the things that got cut should be put back in as a responding gfuck youh.
Can California haz this law?
Gotta love the ACLU for testing their friends.
Never negotiate with terrorists. Yes, I called you a terrorist fatso!
Neither rain nor snow nor sleet, but fuck it, we want to watch college football! Oh yeah, and save some money.
Free Bird. I still remember the news conference after the plane crash, with this man having more stitches in his face than Frankenstein, telling the world what had happened.
Bill ORLY, p0\/\/n3d by Jessica Alba.
Oh, my eyes, my eyes. I may never watch C-SPAN again.
Letfs sing along to gSaltsman, the pig-fucking Republicanh. Yeah, wefll have to squeeze some syllables.
I usually donft give a damn about polls, but I did find this interesting.
Ifm sure than when we have an earthquake Oklahoma is the first place you think of.
I once let a parking ticket go unpaid long enough that a bench warrant was issued for my arrest. It was my own damned fault and I knew it. When I showed up in court I asked the judge if I could plead stupidity. He replied, gYes, but you can only do it once.h I wonder if Norm Coleman can change his plea accordingly.
So because I love you, and because of todayfs loss, Lynard Skynard. Van Zant is having an off night here, but wefre here for the piano, especially starting about the 4 minute mark.
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1/27/09 – Getting into the swing of thingsc
I notice that the Republicans in congress seem to be Lucy with the football these days. Theyfre screaming about the contraceptives set aside that is part of the Obama Stimulus Package and then when it gets watered down they decide to vote against it anyway. What the fuck is wrong with you people?
After 8 years of no funding whatsoever for any effective measures to keep teenage pregnancy under wraps wefre seeing a real concrete step to help reduce not only these pregnancies but the abortions that result from them. But no, thatfs not how they want it – they want to hide their heads in the sand and pretend that people donft have sex.
Dudes and dudettes, people have sex. They fuck. They fuck like rabbits and often with the same results. Nothing wrong with that. Not a single one of you would exist without it, and Ifd be willing to bet that almost every single one of you has done it. Not one thing wrong with that. The real issue is that Republicans want to hide themselves from the fact that children have sex. Teenagers have sex, and lots of it. Ifd bet that most Republicans has sex as teenagers too – all of the ones I know and call friends did. But sex has consequences; sex can get someone pregnant, and sex can kill you. And if we donft teach our children the proper methods to keep these things from happening then disaster will strike.
In the last 8 years, the Drunken Chimp years, teen pregnancy has gone up. Teen abortion has gone up. Theyfve both gone up more than in any other 8 years that these statistics have been kept. Heckofajob there asshole. And what has been the driving message? We teach abstinence. A laudable goal I suppose, but itfs not realistic. Teenagers have fully functioning equipment – can you honestly blame them for taking it out for a test drive? Even conservatives do that – ask a certain Alaska Governor and grandmother who is younger than I am.
Add to that the true scare of AIDS. Ifve lost more friends than I can count to this disease, and I donft want to lose any more. There are only two proven methods of prevention of AIDS and any other sexually transmitted disease. One is abstinence, which again while possible laudable is unrealistic. The other is some sort of barrier that prevents the messy parts of sexual activity from being shared with your partner. We laymen call them condoms. Nothing else works. Nothing. Thatfs science there people – and wefve been without science in our government for so long that itfs made people stupid when they present their arguments (hell, just look at Drudge claim over and over again that global warming isnft real – fucking idiot).
So letfs go back to my original metaphor. The Republicans are Lucy holding the football. One thing I never understood about that series of cartoons is why didnft once, just once, Charley Brown kick Lucy? Itfs what Obama should do.
Cheap Shots:
Nixonfs own lawyer says that we need to prosecute our torturers. Before others do.
Yeah, letfs save newspapers by giving the readers LESS to read.
For those of you waiting for The Watchmen, take a look at this. Woah.
Did we bail out BofA just so they could smack down workerfs rights?
Disclosed! I had hoped this would happen.
I wonder how I can make the Hissy Fit Exception to the Constitution work for me.
What the HELL?
I know that William Kristol is feeling the economic pinch after getting fired from the New York Times this week, but seriously?
Fair Pay passes the House!! Woah Lilly!
We dumped Gray Davis for this load of crap?
And because I love you, Digable Planets.
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And because I love you, have that gin and tonic with a true dose of cool, Bill Evans.
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1/22/09 – 48 hours erases much of the last 8 yearsc
Damn, what a 48 hours. Herefs a partial list of what been done.
The order to close Gitmo was signed. Pay salaries for White House Staff above $100K frozen. Bushfs Executive Orders for the last 90 days reversed. Kangaroo Court trials placed on hold for Gitmo prisoners. Open government by executive order. White House staffers cannot become lobbyists for 2 years after leaving the White House. No more requirement to wear a jacket and tie in the Oval Office. Told the military leadership to give him a plan to leave Iraq. Calling leaders in the Middle East to work on the issues there, and appointing George Mitchell as special envoy to the region. Banned lobbyist gifts. Had Wil Wheaton re-design his website. Transparency in all departments within 120 days. Ordered executive privilege to be at an end when a President leaves office. Directed the Attorney General to review all past Executive Privilege decisions. Called for real science. Told his staff to investigate making government software open source. Forbade all forms of torture – period. Established new guidelines for treatment of detainees. Danced to gAt Lasth 10 times. Gave marching orders to his new State Department. Told the terrfrists that they would be defeated. Told his enemies he would speak with them if freedom and peace is what they want. Prayed for Ted Kennedy. Gave one hell of a speech. Told New Orleans that help is on the way. Got George Clooney to return to E.R. Opened the White House to the public again for the first time since 9/11. Met tourists at the White House. Brought in family that included an African, two interracial couples, a rabbi, and insert your own walks into a bar joke here. Revoked Former President Drunken Chimpfs executive order or 11/1/01 that limited access to the records of former Presidents. Opened the door to nuclear disarmament. Reiterated a womanfs right to choose.
Oh, and he re-took the Presidential Oath that Justice Roberts blew just to shut up Chris Wallace, Jackass Supreme, of Faux News. He had himself re-sworn in to shut up one guy.
Gotta love it.
Cheap Shots:
When Bill Clinton had left office, America had gone 4,658 days without a terrorist attack its national soil. Suck it George.
Free Tattoo!
I guess this means that Al Franken is the Senator.
You really should check out the redesign of whitehouse.gov
Why does Rush Limbaugh hate America so?
The sheriff needs to arrest the sheriff.
And because I love you, Blood Sweat and Tears.
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Yeah, Ifve been gone for a while now. My apologies, but the world has gone a little nuts on my end of the yardstick and I havenft had a whole lot of spare time to work on this. I have a top 5 single. People were laid off at my day job. Itfs been hectic. I promised that I would re-vamp the site but I havenft done it yet. I will soon.
A lot has happened since December 22nd, some of it good – like the majority of Obamafs picks for his administration, and a few have been horrible, from the death of Number 6 to Isreal using President Drunken Chimp as an example of how to subdue a population (come one now, it simply isnft possible to minimize civilian casualties with fucking cluster bombs).
The thing that has stuck in my mind as much as anything else so far is that Obama has been doing something that has caught everyone off guard; hefs been keeping his word. He always said he would reach out to his opposition and try to heal the wound instead of wounding the heels. That dinner the other night at George Willfs place must have been a real doozy, because two of those Obama haters have come out saying good things about the man since.
People are so used to having to read meaning into what a politician says that even with someone gplain spokenh like the Chimp it could mean any of a dozen things. But not so with Obama. Itfs not that hefs plain spoken (he isnft) itfs that he speaking requires that you pay attention, because he almost always (so far) actually spells out the nuances. We havenft had someone like that in the White House in my lifetime, which is now 2 Presidents less than Helen Thomas has been biting at the heels of the heels.
For example, last Sunday Obama was talking about the closing of Guantanamo and said that it would take more than the first 100 days to accomplish. Immediately many on the left screamed in outrage with vein-popping venom we havenft seen on our side of the aisle (Ifm guessing people dragged out the ORLY tape from when he was on Inside Edition for inspiration) that Obama was going back on his word. But you need to pay attention. What he actually said was that it probably wouldnft happen physically in the first 100 days. Logistically dealing with the men wefve been keeping there will be less than easy. He may order the shutdown on January 21st. But I would bet that it will take until June or later to do the actual work.
Obama didnft run away from his appointment for Treasury Secretary, not even after a tax problem and a nanny problem, things that have sunk nominees in the past. He stood by the man and it looks like hefs going to get confirmed. Amazing what a little backbone will do for you.
Drunken Chimp and his followers have run this country for the past 8 years under the guiding principle of gI donft care what you thinkh. Even if it hurts you, they were going to do what they thought was grighth. Obamafs policy so far is to not only care what you think, but to do the right thing to help. Itfs not apples and oranges, itfs apples and Humvees.
So far, a lot of us, press and bloggers alike, havenft adjusted to this. I wonder if they will?
Cheap Shots:
We need hundreds of Helen Thomases. My cousin even said so.
From deathfs door, I spit at theec Goodbye to the great Latin leading man. I met the man in the 80fs, he was very cool.
Finally, a Congressman saying gshow me the money!h
And finally, duh.
Now that SCHIP has passed the House, I wonder if that crazy bitch from the gRepublicans are pedophilesh post will be stalking this guy.
And because I love you, White Zombie.
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